I'm Still Here
by wildkidlexie
Summary: Teddy Lupin wasn't always the man nineteen years later after the war ended. Teddy had also been a boy confused, scared, and alone. Life without parents isn't easy. Having a werewolf for a father isn't easy. How would Teddy feel in this situation?
1. Lyrics

** I'm Still Here**

I am a question to the world,  
Not an answer to be heard.  
All a moment that's held in your arms.  
And what do you think you'd ever say?  
I won't listen anyway┘  
You don't know me,  
And I▓ll never be what you want me to be.

And what do you think you'd understand?  
I'm a boy, no, I'm a man..  
You can take me and throw me away.  
And how can you learn what's never shown?  
Yeah, you stand here on your own.  
They don't know me 'cause I'm not here.

And I want a moment to be real,  
Wanna touch things I don't feel,  
Wanna hold on and feel I belong.  
And how can the world want me to change,  
They▓re the ones that stay the same.  
The don▓t know me,  
'Cause I▓m not here. 

And you see the things they never see  
All you wanted, I could be  
Now you know me, and I'm not afraid  
And I wanna tell you who I am  
Can you help me be a man?  
They can't break me  
As long as I know who I am 

And I want a moment to be real,  
Wanna touch things I don't feel,  
Wanna hold on and feel I belong.  
And how can the world want me to change,  
They▓re the ones that stay the same.  
They can▓t see me,  
But I▓m still here. 

They can▓t tell me who to be,  
▒Cause I▓m not what they see.  
And the world is still sleepin▓,  
While I keep on dreamin▓ for me.  
And their words are just whispers  
And lies that I▓ll never believe.

And I want a moment to be real,  
Wanna touch things I don't feel,  
Wanna hold on and feel I belong.  
And how can they say I never change  
They▓re the ones that stay the same.  
I▓m the one now,  
▒Cause I▓m still here.

I▓m the one,  
▒Cause I▓m still here.  
I▓m still here.  
I▓m still here.  
I▓m still here. 


	2. Be Happy

**A/N: Hope you like this. I'm officially hooked to Teddy Lupin and very fascinated by his character (although we barely got to see him). Hope you like this story of mine**

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything but the plot**

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_**December 1999**_

"Happy Christmas, Andromeda," said Harry as he entered the living room. Andromeda gave him a pleasant smile. Harry walked over to her and saw one-year-old Teddy sleeping in Andromeda's arm. He crouched down and touched his face. "He's getting bigger, isn't her?" said Harry as he admired his godson. His gazed onto Teddy's purple hair. "He isn't a werewolf, right?"

Andromeda shook her head. "I don't think so," she said quietly. "He doesn't sprout a single hair when the full moon comes around and he doesn't show any sign of being irritated." Andromeda stroked his hair. "He often looks at his parents' pictures though, as if he already misses them." She looked thoughtfully at sleeping little Teddy.

Harry sighed. "I wish Lupin and Tonks…" he voice faded. He felt sorry for the little baby and imagined how his life would be. He had been there, done that. It wasn't easy to live alone. When the day is done, sometimes you just want a mother and a father to assure you of their love. Harry looked at Teddy for a moment before standing up. "I'll be back tomorrow. Ginny and I will come. Let's celebrate Christmas together," he said.

Andromeda nodded. "It's a pleasure to celebrate it with you," she replied. Harry smiled weakly. She stood up, carrying Teddy with her, and led Harry to the door. "Do you want to hold him before you leave?" she asked. Harry nodded as he held out his arms. Andromeda slowly placed the baby into it. "Mind the head," she whispered.

Harry held his godson who stirred but did not wake. "Lupin and Tonks would've been proud of him," he said in a low voice. Teddy did have his father's ears and his mother's mouth. Harry rocked the baby. He felt for him. Life wasn't going to be easy for Teddy Lupin. "I wish I could turn back time and save Lupin and Tonks. Teddy deserves to have his parents right by his side."

Andromeda nodded sadly. "I do believe so too," she replied. She looked at Teddy who moved a bit again. "He's been such a nice boy. He doesn't wake up in the middle of the night. He doesn't fuss. Sometimes I worry about him. He doesn't cry when he's hungry. He just looks at me." Harry could hear a sad tone from Andromeda as she spoke. "It isn't easy going to be easy to explain things to him when he grows up, is it?" she said.

Harry shook his head as he handed Teddy back to his grandmother. "No," he answered. "The war was complicated and…" Harry sighed heavily and turned. He still couldn't get over Remus's death somehow. He was the last man to live among the Marauders. He was the last memory of his own father. Harry lowered his head. "I best be going now," he said, "goodnight, Andromeda." Harry Apparated away to his home at Godric's Hollow.

"Harry." Harry looked up and saw Ron standing in the middle of the dark. He walked up to Harry. The cold wind blew past them. "Mum asked if you would like to come to the Burrow. It's lonely living here alone," Ron said as he jerked his head at the house Harry lived in. True, no one lived there but Harry. Ron looked away. "Actually it's my idea." He looked back at Harry. "It's been a year. Everyone's got to move on. I lost a brother and I try to go on too because life doesn't stop here."

Harry smiled faintly. "I know, Ron." He dug his hands into his pocket. "I know I'm in no position to be gloomy because I haven't really lost anyone that close to me. But in a way, I'm responsible for everyone's death." Harry felt a frog come up his throat at the thought of the people who had died during the war. "I should've ended it long before. I had too many close calls with Voldemort and I didn't kill him there and then."

"You were a boy, Harry. A child so as to say," countered Ron. "You couldn't have done anything more than send some sparks at him." Harry evaded Ron's eyes. It has indeed been a year after the war ended. Everybody tried to go on with their lives, though the mark of their loss will always be visible. Ron placed his hand on Harry's shoulder. "It's high time you got back to your happy self. It's not your fault. Teddy wouldn't want to have a sullen godfather. Remember Sirius?" he asked.

Harry rolled his eyes. "He wasn't sullen but he was bitter." Ron shook his head sympathetically at Harry. Harry couldn't blame Ron for worrying about him. Even Hermione is very worried. She sends him owls almost everyday. Ginny visits him everyday. Harry took out his hand and felt the cold wind. "I feel for Teddy too. He lost his parents in the war. I don't know what to tell him when he grows up. He'll be asking a lot of questions about his parents," said Harry.

Ron nodded understandingly. "I believe that's true," he replied. He looked at Harry. "Look, it's Christmas. Come enjoy with us. You're going to celebrate with Teddy and Andromeda tomorrow. You celebrate it with us tonight. Sleep over too, like we used to do back then when we were still at Hogwarts. I'm worried about you, mate. You should get out of that house more often. You'll end up like Kreacher if you go on like this, that nutty House-elf. Though helpful, he's still nutty."

This made Harry smile. "I agree." The two men stood there for a moment, each staring at the snow below at their feet, not knowing what to say to each other. Harry finally broke the silence. "I guess I want to see Ginny too," he said. "She's been coming over. I know we're in a relationship, but I think I'm straining it with what I'm doing."

"You think?" said Ron, raising an eyebrow. Harry smiled, his face easing. Ron smiled back. "Come on. Everyone's waiting at the dinner table by now." They walked on. Ron stopped for a moment and looked at Harry. "But I tell you. If you _do _have to snog my sister, I'd rather you do it somewhere _privately_," he said in a very serious tone.

Harry laughed. "All right," he assured Ron. They both Apparated to the Burrow.

Molly Weasley threw her arms around Harry when she saw him. "Happy Christmas, Harry," she said. She hugged Ron as well. She beamed at the both of them. "It's been a while since I saw you both walking through the door together." She looked at them for a moment, then turned and walked straight to the kitchen. "Dinner's ready. Come now," she said.

Ron and Harry followed her to the dining table. Ginny sprang from her seat once she spotted Harry. She embraced him tightly and gave him a kiss on the cheek. Ron looked at Harry, his eyes saying: _remember your promise. _Harry smiled and hugged Ginny back, though he did not return the kiss. Yet. Harry and Ginny sat beside each other as Molly served dinner.

It wasn't until Hermione spoke that Harry noticed her. "I'm glad you decided to join us." Harry was happy to see him. He stood up and gave her a hug. Hermione smiled pleasantly at him. "I was thinking you wouldn't, but I am glad you did. It's been a long time since I saw you out and about." Hermione never looked this cheerful from the last time Harry saw her. Ron was right. It was indeed time to move on. Hermione and Harry went back to their seats to begin dinner.

Arthur Weasley raised a cup. "A toast," he started, "to a brand new Christmas where everyone looks happy. Happy Christmas." Everyone raised their cups. Arthur looked at Harry. "I'm also happy to see you here. Are you sleeping over?" Harry nodded. Ginny looked very much delighted. Arthur nodded with a smile. "Indeed I am very happy," he added.

A knock came to the door. Everyone looked up. Molly opened the door to find her eldest son Bill and his wife Fleur. She was stunned to see him. After a few seconds, she flung her arms around Bill who smiled as he hugged his mother back. Molly also gave Fleur a hug. Apparently, the Weasleys weren't expecting the pair to arrive.

"We've got news," said Bill as he, Molly, and Fleur came closer to the dining table. Bill found a place by the table. He pulled out a chair for Fleur. Molly went back to her seat. Bill smiled at the people about the table. "Our new baby is due two months from now," he announced.

Everyone cheered. Harry smiled widely as he clapped. Another Weasley was to be born soon. He looked over at Molly who looked delighted to hear the news that tears came down from her eyes. She is going to be a grandmother soon. Bill thanked everyone. Molly gave him and Fleur each a plate and a cup so that they might join dinner.

"We're going to have dinner with Teddy and Andromeda tomorrow, right?" whispered Ginny to Harry as they ate. Harry nodded. Ginny wiped his lips with a napkin. "You have chicken on you upper lip," she said. Harry smiled at her. She looked very wonderful tonight. He can't believe that she didn't leave him throughout the year that he tried to seclude himself from people, particularly the Weasleys. Partly because he felt guilty about Fred's death and partly because he didn't want to see to see anyone else look sad. The Weasleys are like a family to him. "I'll give you your present later tonight."

Harry broke into a smile. "Does it come in a package?" he asked.

Ginny shook her head. "Not exactly."

The next day, Harry left early. "I'm going to buy a present for Teddy," he told Ron. Ron raised his eyebrow as he leaned on the wall. Ginny had Harry's arm around her. Harry smiled at Ron. "Oh don't worry. I won't snog her in public," he promised. Ginny giggled and gave Harry a playful push. "See you later, Ron. Have fun with Hermione." Ron turned scarlet. Harry rolled his eyes. "As if I don't know." He gave Ron a wave and then the pair Apparated away,

"So this is what a Muggle mall looks like," murmured Ginny as she looked around. She had never been to a Muggle mall before. Harry thought it would be amusing to take her to one, seeing that she had been to all Wizarding malls and know the way around them by heart. Ginny leaned on Harry as they walked. "So what are you thinking for Teddy's present?" she asked.

Harry shrugged. "I'll figure out something," he replied as they walked on. "I want this Christmas to be special for Teddy, something memorable. I want to buy him something that would bring meaning." Harry looked at each shop window as they passed along them. "Andromeda mentioned that he's been looking at his parents' picture a lot lately. I don't think a picture frame would be a sensible gift to a one-year-old though," he said uncertainly.

"Of course it is not," said Ginny quickly. "What he needs is something he can play with." They happened to pass by a toy shop as she said it. Something caught Ginny's eye. She pulled Harry into the shop. "I've found something that might be a lot of use and fun for Teddy," she said as she pulled Harry along with her. Ginny's eyes sparkled with much excitement as she picked up a stuffed wolf. "What do you think?" she asked.

Harry broke into a smile. "I think it's perfect," he replied. He gave Ginny a one-armed hug. "You're a genius." Ginny smiled back and nodded. Harry laughed a bit. "And cocky too," he added. Ginny stuck her tongue out as a joke. Harry led her to the counter. Ginny looked at it with fascination though she did not say anything so as not to attract attention from the customers behind them. "I'd like to have it wrapped," said Harry as he paid for the stuffed wolf.

Ginny and Harry walked around the mall some more. Harry showed Ginny everything interesting he knew about Muggle malls. He had only seen malls through pictures his aunt and uncle took o Dudley when he still lived with the Dursleys. He had never actually been into one either. Harry and Ginny went to catch a movie too. Though they weren't actually paying attention to the movie during the whole time they were in the movie house.

"Moony," Harry whispered as he and Ginny walked towards the subway. Ginny wanted to see how the Muggles traveled. "That's what we'll call the stuffed toy," he said. Ginny nodded understandingly. Harry gave her a quick kiss on the forehead. "I bet Teddy would enjoy this toy. You've really got a stroke of genius with you," he said. They headed straight for Andromeda's place.

"Happy Christmas!" Ginny greeted. Andromeda smiled when she opened the door. Ginny and Harry wiped their shoes on the rug before entering. Ginny spotted little Teddy sitting on the carpet, staring at a blank space. "What's he doing?" Ginny asked Andromeda.

Andromeda sighed. "He's been doing that lately," she admitted. "I don't know what he's thinking. He's too young to talk and I can't seem to fathom his mind work. Some days he's happy and some days he's just not. Like now, he's just staring at something I don't know what. Some days he stares at his parents' pictures. He won't play with hi toys. He rarely will," she said.

Harry held up a paper bag. "I got him a present," he said flatly. He walked towards Teddy. Teddy turned to him. Harry set down the paper bag and smiled at him. He scooped Teddy up from the ground and threw him into the air. "Up you go!" Teddy finally laughed. Harry caught him and said, "Now that's my little Teddy laughing."

Andromeda walked over to them. "I'm glad he has you as a godfather, Harry. Only you can make him smile." She looked at the clock. "I'm going to fix some tea. You and Ginny make yourselves at home." She disappeared into the kitchen after she said it.

Ginny neared Harry and Teddy. "Hi Teddy." Teddy smiled at her. She was glad to see Teddy smile. "Harry's got something for you." She picked up the paper bag. Teddy looked at it. "Let him sit on the floor so that he could open his present," instructed Ginny. Harry nodded and lowered Teddy to the floor. Ginny placed the present in front of him. "Happy Christmas, Teddy," she said.

Teddy reached out for the package. Harry and Ginny helped him open it. Teddy's hair turned blue when he first laid his eyes on his new toy. He grabbed it and pulled it closer to him. Ginny and Harry looked at each other and exchanged happy looks. The fire in the hearth crackled. It seemed to dance with joy as to what the persons in the living room were feeling as of the moment.

"His name is Moony," said Harry as he watched Teddy cuddle the stuffed wolf. "He's going to be watching over you from now on." Teddy gurgled. Harry laughed and wiped the saliva coming out from the side of the baby's mouth. Harry carried Teddy as Teddy held his stuffed wolf. He stood up and Ginny did too. "Happy Christmas, Teddy Bear," Harry whispered into his godson's ear. "I do hope you stay happy all the time."

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**A/N: Please review! Thanks a lot. **

**Song will come up on the next chapter. Hope you review. See you!**


	3. Heart Ache

**A/N: ****Thank you to the reviewers: sunshine-rain, Buttersbee, Tap Dancing Widow, wICH, Wizard19036 (thank you so much for keeping up with all of my stories, I really appreciate it. **

**Thanks to those who put this on alerts and favorites. I hope you enjoy the story!  
**

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_**November 2008**_

"No!" Teddy yelled stubbornly. He turned his back to his grandmother. "I am not going to go there again. I've been there last year!" Teddy ran upstairs to his room. Andromeda heard him slam the door hard. Every year she and Teddy go through this scene ever since he could talk, or as far as she could remember, every time they had to go visit his parents' graves.

**I am a question to the world**

Andromeda made her way up to Teddy's room. "You are not to shout at me like that Ted Remus Lupin," she scolded as she knocked on Teddy's door. "Now I want you to unlock this door before _I_ do it myself," she said in a very threatening voice indeed.

Teddy turned on his bed and buried his face on his pillow. "Go ahead," he said. He couldn't care less if his grandmother would force the door open. She did it every year during this time of year and it began to seem like a routine. "You always do," he murmured, though Andromeda could make out what he said. She opened the door using magic and stared sternly at Teddy. Teddy turned his head. "Why can't I stay home this year?" he asked.

"You always ask that," replied Andromeda. She walked over to him and grabbed his arm. "It's very simply. Remus and Dora are your parents and you ought to visit them every year." She practically dragged Teddy out of bed. "Now I want you to dress properly and prepare to go. Harry would come to pick you up at any moment. I'll follow after you. There are some things I have to attend to," she said.

Teddy tried to heavy himself so that Andromeda would have a harder time pulling him. "But I don't want to go!" he whined. Andromeda shook her head and dragged him off to the bathroom. She walked over to his closet and gave him some clothes to wear. Teddy stood in the middle of the bathroom frowning. "I already went there last year!" he complained.

"And every year from now as well," continued Andromeda. She threw Teddy a towel. "Now bathe yourself properly and don't wrinkle your clothes. You don't want to face your parents all untidy, do you?" she said and was about to walk away when Teddy spoke up.

"But they're dead!" he countered. Andromeda spun wildly and glared at him. Every year Teddy complained about going to the cemetery to see his parents' graves. Every year he tried to come up with an excuse so as not to go. Every year he seemed reluctant on going. But it was only this year when he said this. Teddy scowled. "They're dead, Grammy. They won't see me if I'm untidy or not."

Andromeda was about to speak when she heard a deep voice speak for her from behind. "Oh they will." She turned to see Harry standing behind her. "Your door was unlocked so I came in. Don't worry. I locked it now." Andromeda nodded. She walked out from the room without another word, looking very much upset. Harry sighed. "Why do you always make your grandmother suffer so much?" he asked Teddy as he looked at the young boy.

"But it's true," said Teddy in a low voice. He tried to avoid Harry's eyes as he spoke. "What's the point of going there every year? I don't see my parents and I doubt that they see me. They're dead, Harry. The dead can't see." He turned around. "They didn't even make themselves ghosts," he muttered. He slowly closed the bathroom door.

Harry slightly shook his head. "They wanted to move on, Ted," he explained. Teddy didn't reply. He could hear Teddy turn out the shower. "Besides, your parents do see you. I bet they do. I may not be an expert of the other world, but I bet you that they're watching you right now." Harry heard the shower stop. "Are you all right in there?" he asked.

"Yep," Teddy replied. He opened the shower again so that he wouldn't be heard. He touched his face. He could tell clearly that there were tears in his eyes. He sobbed for a moment as he thought about what he had done to his grandmother. He knows perfectly well that it wasn't her fault she died, but he couldn't feel angry at her somehow. Why hadn't she stopped them? "I'll be out soon, Harry," assured Teddy as he finished his bath.

Harry looked at Teddy as he came out from the bathroom. "You better apologize to your grandmother," he said calmly. Teddy looked away as he dried his hair with a towel. Harry sighed. "Your mother was her daughter. Do you think she needed reminding that Tonks is gone?" Harry didn't mean to say this. Teddy is hurting just as much, although he rarely shows it. Harry's eyes followed as Teddy grabbed his backpack, indicating that he was ready to go. "Aren't you going to talk with your grandmother first?" he asked.

"She won't talk to me at this point," countered Teddy, knowing his grandmother. He walked out of the room. Harry followed behind him. Teddy walked past his parents' picture that hung on the wall. He didn't want to look at it. Looking at the picture won't make them closer to him, or so he feels. Teddy felt Harry's hand on his shoulder. He looked back at Harry. Harry gave him a thoughtful look. "I'll apologize later tonight. Don't worry."

Harry shook his head. "That's not what I'm worried about really," he admitted. Teddy pursed his lips. "Teddy, what have we done to make you hate going to your parents' graves? It isn't like we're punishing you. What makes you hate them? I told you they died to-"

"Make a better world for me, I know," interrupted Teddy. He pulled his backpack closer to his back. It isn't that he hated them. How could he hate someone he never knew? He just didn't understand why he had to go _see_ his parents when there is really no one to see, just two stones that had their names on it. Teddy turned around. "Let's just go," he said.

Harry looked at Tonks and Lupin's picture and shook his head. "I honestly don't know what to say to him," he murmured so that only he (and the picture) could hear. He watched as Teddy leave through the front door. He looked at the staircase and hoped that Andromeda would come down so that he knows that she was okay, but she didn't. He didn't want to be nosy so he decided to go ahead to the cemetery with Teddy.

It was a long silent walk to Lupin and Tonks's graves. Teddy didn't speak up and Harry didn't know what else to say to him. For some reason, he couldn't break the invisible barrier between him and Teddy. He could never tell what is going through his mind. Many times he suspects Teddy misses his parents, but he never expresses it and never says anything about it. Teddy never acts his age, or it is such as Harry sees it.

"We're here," Harry sad quietly as he walked up to the graves. Teddy winced beside him. Harry placed his hand on Teddy's shoulder. "What's wrong, Teddy?" he asked. Teddy didn't reply. "You should talk about it, you know. We've been going on and on like this since you were five years old. I don't see why you have to take it against your parents. I told you how much they love you and if they had a chance to stay behind they would've."

Teddy nodded halfheartedly. "I know," he replied. Harry watched as Teddy's eyes shifted from one tree to another, trying to avoid his parents' graves. "Isn't anyone else coming?" Teddy asked. Every year Ron and Hermione came along too. Sometimes Bill and Fleur would come, occasionally bringing Victoire. Arthur and Molly Weasley come by too, from time to time, though not every year.

Harry shook his head. "No. Everyone seems to be busy this year. Ron wanted to spend the whole day in Fred's." Teddy bit his lower lip. "You're not the only one who had lost someone in the war. Practically all of us had. Your parents, they don't want to see you like this. They want to see you smile, you know. There are times when you should for their sake." Harry knew it would be hard to smile knowing that he would never see his parents. Harry stroked Teddy's purple hair.

"Why did Mum and Dad give birth to me just to leave me like this?" Teddy suddenly asked out of the blue. Harry looked at him. Teddy lowered his head. He tried to hide his face. "I was an accident, wasn't I? They didn't mean to have a kid during the war, didn't they?" he said. His voice was broken as he said it. Maybe his heart was too.

**Not an answer to be heard**

Harry's face eased. "Look at me, Teddy." Teddy didn't look up. Harry lightly touched Teddy's face. Teddy looked up. Harry saw his wet pained eyes. "You are _not _an accident. You are Remus and Nymphadora's son. They planned to have you. They were most happy to have you." Harry wiped away the tears in Teddy's eyes. "I remember when your father announced your birth. He looked so happy he looked ten years younger. He loved you so much, so did your mother. You are the sole memory of them. You are your parents in one little package. You are and will never be an accident," he said.

Teddy didn't reply. He looked away from Harry. Not long after the moment of silence between him and Harry, Andromeda appeared. She walked towards the graves and lowered flowers she brought along with her. The wind blew past them. Harry looked at Andromeda who smiled pleasantly at him, as if nothing had happened that morning.

"Let's go, shall we, Teddy? I believe Harry has some places to go to," said Andromeda. Teddy walked to her. Andromeda looked at Teddy. "I'm sorry I cannot visit Fred's. I have somewhere to go and I'll be leaving Teddy with a friend of mine. I know you and Ginny will go visit, since Fred is Ginny's brother." She placed her arm around Teddy. "Come on, Ted."

It could be Harry's imagination, but he saw eve more sadness in Teddy's eyes when Andromeda said it. "Why not let Teddy stay a bit longer?" he asked. "He wouldn't be coming by here for seven years in November. I think He should spend a little more time with his parents today." Andromeda found the idea interesting and nodded. Harry held his hand out to Teddy. "Come on. Let's go find some shade, but we'll be around."

Andromeda looked at Harry. "Are you sure you're going to take him?"

Harry nodded. "I'm sure," he replied. With a blink of an eye, Andromeda Apparated away. Harry took Teddy to the nearest tree. He sat down on the soft grass. He smiled for a bit. "You know what? I think your parents are happy that you're here right now. Maybe a little sad too. You would be going to Hogwarts next year. You wouldn't be able to come here as often. Not even during their birthdays." Teddy didn't react. Harry leaned on the tree behind him. "Your parents loved you, you know."

"I know," Teddy replied. "That's what you always tell me."

Harry looked at the sky. "It's the truth. I remember how excited he was to find out he was going to have you." Harry knew this was sort of a lie. Lupin wasn't actually excited. He was even anxious when he found out Tonks was pregnant. But it Teddy knew this, he would be placed in deeper trouble more than this hot spot. "They were so proud to have you."

"I bet they were," countered Teddy lamely, as if uninterested to talk about it. Teddy looked at the sky too. Two owls flew by. They were headed towards the North, Hogwarts' direction. "You're right. I'll be going to Hogwarts next year. I'll only be home for Christmas." Teddy felt afraid of this even long before, but he never told anyone. He feared leaving his home, his grandmother; but he didn't want anyone to know this. He was afraid they might take him for a coward.

Harry smiled. "Are you excited?" he asked.

Teddy shrugged. "I don't know." Harry raised an eyebrow. Teddy looked past his parents' graves and to the people gathering at the next grave. He knew perfectly well that it belonged to Colin Creevey, one of the brave students who fought the battle. "Harry, did my dad and mum kiss me before they went off for battle?" he asked.

"I wasn't there to witness it. I was out there battling myself," Harry answered. "You have to ask your grandmother that. She was at home with you during the time. But I have a feeling they did. Like I said, if they had a choice, they wouldn't have left you. You were so important to them. You meant the whole world to them. They even died to make you a better world."

"But it was a pointless battle they fought right?" Teddy said. Harry was taken back by the boy's statement. He had never thought of anyone battling that night as a worthless battle. Teddy looked at Harry. "Dad went off because he loved the Wizarding world. Mum left because she loved Dad. What's left for me?" Teddy's eyes shifted to the ground as she gently touched it. "If they loved me, they would've stayed at home right? They would've been afraid someone might kill me."

Harry sighed. There were some answers he couldn't justify. He heard a hint of bitterness in Teddy's voice. He seldom spoke of his parents and when he did it was always the issue whether they loved him or not. It's not really a debatable issue and Harry knew that Teddy is just hurting on the inside. There were a lot of times when Harry couldn't bear to look at him. Sometimes he sees his old self in Teddy. The old self that had always felt confused and lonely.

For one reason or another, Teddy couldn't understand why his parents had to fight that battle. He saw is a worthless. They didn't kill Voldemort. Harry did. If they had stayed home, they might've even been alive. Teddy had heard every story about how his parents loved him, but he knew that there was something behind their love. There were things Harry kept from him and he could feel it. He didn't ask Harry. If he did, Harry would even be more careful about his words.

"It's going to be all right, Teddy," assured Harry. It was the best comforting words he could say to the boy. "They loved you more than you'll ever know. I don't have all the answers, but I knew your parents. I saw them. They climbed through a lot of trials to be together. They loved each other. You are the product of that love, so that's why they love you eve more."

Teddy didn't say anything more after that. He just looked at his parents' grave. Many times he doubted Harry's words. He knew that at some point, Harry made up some of his stories. He never told anyone, but he didn't want to visit his parents' graves because he was afraid. He was afraid that they'd see him so bitter. Teddy knew he had no right to be angry with them. They didn't mean to die. But for some reason, he couldn't stop blaming them for fighting.

Every year he had the same hurting feeling in him. Every year he felt the same anger. He didn't want to visit his parents' graves, another reason, is that he didn't want to be reminded that they were gone. He wanted to cling to the hope he had in him that they might be coming home someday. They would go through the door and hug him, kiss him, like Harry does for his children. For some reason, every year, his heart ached and he knew the only people who could have mended it were gone.

**All a moment that's held in your arms**

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**A/N: Please review!**


	4. Lonely

**A/N: ****Thank you to the reviewers: Saoden, Yukiko T., Aly Martin, Wizard19036. You guys are encouraging. Thanks for the reviews!**

**Thanks to Choco who Beta for me. Love you, girl. **

**Please review this one too  
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_**March 2011**_

Teddy ran across the hallway. Someone was heard crying and screaming. Professor Longbottom went to check what was happening. Again, Teddy had pulled a prank on one of the students. He had always been doing so since he was in his first year. It wasn't uncommon for Teddy to land in detention and even the professors are tired of deducting House points from Gryffindor because of him. Teddy doesn't seem to care about anything.

The professors can condemn his behavior but not his mind. Teddy is one of the top students in school. He gets very high grades. Unexpected grades from a student that dozes off and causing too much trouble. Many thinks he cheats on exams, but the professors highly doubt it. Teddy has a brilliant mind. That's how he can cast spells for his pranks. Some spells he casts aren't meant for wizards his age. Many professors shake their heads saying he's wasting off his talents.

**And what do you think you'd ever say?**

"You're talented, brilliant, and hardworking as far as I could tell because you've submitted every single piece of homework," said Professor Longbottom exasperatedly. It seemed that nothing would go through the boy, not all the sermons in the world. "You're wasting all this on pranks? I know what it feels like to have no parents because I practically lost mine as far as I can remember and I was also raised by my grandmother, but this attitude is very much unacceptable. Your father was a professor here. What do you think he'd say if he sees you like this?"

Teddy rolled his eyes. "He's dead. He'll never see me."

"What is wrong with you?" Teddy looked at Professor Longbottom. He had never raised his voice and he was never this impatient. "Professor Lupin was one of the best professors there was in Hogwarts. No matter what his circumstances were, he fought against it. He stood up against the odds. What are you complaining about? He was the one who suffered," he pointed out.

"Yeah, and he passed on the suffering to me," countered Teddy. He hated it when Professor Longbottom made his father as an example. Harry had told him that his father was a werewolf before he entered Hogwarts. Teddy was jeered upon by the Slytherins. He was loathed by some other students from the other three different Houses. They never let him forget who his father was. Pranks were the only way he could find his happiness, even if he had to do them alone. He didn't have a friend in Hogwarts. No one wanted to be.

Professor Longbottom stared straight at Teddy's eyes. "I'm surprised Harry didn't disown you as a godson with this attitude." Professor Longbottom had gotten irritated by now. He tried to be patient with Teddy. He tried to understand him. But he felt Teddy didn't want to help himself. "I give up on your case, Lupin."

Teddy blinked. "Finally?" he asked. It was the last straw. Professor Longbottom could no longer hold his temper. He cursed under his breath and yelled for Teddy to get out of the office. Teddy went out and slowly closed the door behind him. It wasn't that he disliked Professor Longbottom. In fact, he found the professor's lectures interesting, though he never showed it. He just didn't like anyone talking to him as if they were his _father_.

"Hey werewolf-boy. It's the full moon tonight," sneered a Slytherin, two years older than he is. Teddy rolled his eyes. The Slytherin boy and his friend walked up to him. They both took out their wands and pointed it at Teddy. "That was clearly disrespect," hissed the boy with a big fat ugly head, according to Teddy's eyes.

Teddy narrowed his own eyes. "Who the hell would respect a git like you?" he hissed back. He took out his own wand. "I don't think you'd be very smart if you cast a spell out here, right in front of Longbottom's office. Maybe you'd like to join me in detention?" he asked.

The two Slytherins lowered their wands, but they still had smirks on their faces. "I never knew you were a teacher's pet, Lupin." Teddy raised an eyebrow. He calmly looked at the two Slytherins, as calmly as he could. Inside, he was about to kill them and tear them into shreds. It would be n ideal thing to d if only they were his size, or so he thought. The Slytherin boys grinned evilly. "I bet your father was ashamed that he gave birth to a werewolf junior that's why he decided to act heroic and battle. The real reason was, Lupin, was he didn't want you. It's far more _honorable_ the way he died, really."

"Damn you," cursed Teddy. He pointed his wand straight at the Slytherin boys. "Silencio," he muttered. He walked off from the Slytherin boys without them saying another word about him. Teddy grinned, knowing that although he was a lot smaller, he was a lot smarter. It was the only weapon he had with him, his brain. He knew it was something he had to thank his father for.

**I won't listen anyway…**

That month of the year came when Teddy almost always received a Howler. Everyone knew that apart from letters and gifts, which were regular for almost everybody, Teddy Lupin would receive a Howler. He had almost gotten used to his grandmother's yelling by now that he had gotten numb to the fact that she was even yelling at him.

_"You don't know what you life is going to be like when you are expelled Ted Remus Lupin! I won't baby you and let you come home crying, that's for sure. I didn't raise you to become a hateful boy you are now, causing so much trouble for your professors. The Headmistress sends me everything you do per WEEK! Per WEEK, Teddy, meaning that you never do anything right in a month! You should be ashamed of yourself. You have a bright future ahead of you and you're wasting all of it. I can't believe this! I shouldn't have spoilt you so much! Maybe my friends were right. Maybe I should have given you a smack or two. Sympathy will never work with you, will it, Ted? I hope one day life smacks at your face and you'll realize how stupid you are right now. I will not be there to put my arm around you when that time comes. You are on your own, Ted Lupin. You hear me? ON YOUR OWN!"_

The Howler tore itself into shreds. Everyone stared at Teddy who looked dully at the Howler, as if it was nothing but another regular letter. Teddy shook his head and sighed. He walked off to the Quidditch field. Maybe it was because of his pent up anger that won him a spot as a Beater. Maybe because it was his bottled up frustration that got him the position. No matter what it was, Teddy had been part of the Gryffindor team since second year and he is one of the priced players of the team.

"You're late," said the team captain, Gary Droll. He eyes Teddy as Teddy mounted the broom. "Look at me, Lupin. I am talking to you." Teddy looked at him nonchalantly. Gary took a deep breath. "You are not a child anymore, Lupin. Don't act like one." Teddy blinked. Gary waved his hand. "Go on. Have practice with them," he said.

Teddy kicked off from the ground. He flew up into the sky. He loved to fly. It took his mind away from everything, even his bitterness. The wind blowing past him always makes him feel calmer than ever. He loved life on the air. Many times he wished he was born an owl. Teddy grabbed his bat tight and hit the Bludger coming towards his way.

"If it wasn't for you being a great Beater I doubt you'd be on this team," hissed Ben Reel, a sixth year. He'd been trying to be friends with Teddy for so long but Teddy always so reluctant. Ben is a Chaser for the Gryffindor team. Teddy rolled his eyes. Ben sighed. "You don't have to be so cocky. Do you have an idea how much people in this team hate you? They'd kick you off the minute you'd make a mistake if they can," he warned.

Teddy looked carelessly at the sky. "Let them. I don't need the team for me to live life, do I?" He swopped down after the Bludger and hit it. It went right through one of the posts. Ben flew in Teddy's level. Teddy looked at him. "I didn't ask for this position. I wasn't the one who begged to be on the team. The team came to me."

"Why do you have to be terribly bigheaded?" asked Ben. He shook his head disapprovingly. "Even with the smarts and good looks, no girl is ever going to come crawling to you with that attitude. You'll soon regret it, I tell you. I've been there, done that. You need to deflate your head a bit. Come back to earth where you belong. I know your story. My parents knew your mother. I feel for you, Ted, but this just isn't the way you should be. Here at school, no one really cares what you've gone through," he pointed out. "We're equals here."

Teddy looked away from Ben. "And they're all equally putting me down and badmouthing my genes," he said. "I know you're trying to cheer me up, but it won't help. I don't need it. I'm all right." Teddy pulled his broom and flew thirty feet above Ben. He knew it was a lie, what he said. He wasn't all right and he doubted that he would be. No one would be able to understand him, what he feels. Some gets close, like Professor Longbottom and Harry, but not close enough. They aren't sons of werewolves. In fact, people think their parents died a worthy cost, unlike his whose cause of death no one even witnessed.

**You don't know me**

"Three hundred and twelve," Professor Binns said, handing Teddy's parchment to Teddy. He looked at Teddy's bored face. "I never knew you paid attention to my lectures. You're the only student who got past the last ten questions," he said. Murmurs came all throughout the room. Teddy could her some of them say that he had cheated on the exam. Professor Binns must have heard it too because he added, "With and anti-cheating quill too."

No one could doubt Teddy's brilliant mind. He had to do minimal studying to perfect an exam. He rarely went to the library for a read. But when he did, it was on a special occasion. Professors and students alike are marveled at Teddy's mind. No one could read his thoughts. He was simply a brilliant boy, disturbed, but brilliant nonetheless.

Of all Teddy hated, it's Harry's letters. No, it wasn't that Harry bombards him with lengthy sermons like professors and his grandmother does. In fact, he rarely gives him sermons in his letters. It's always rather annoyingly encouraging and cheerful. Teddy saw his owl Pork fly through the window and deliver him the letter. Teddy sighed and tore it open since he had nothing better to do.

_Dear Ted,_

_I heard from Neville that you did more than excellent in your Herbology exam. __He was quite excited to tell me that you might proceed to the next level as the top of the batch again, just as you did the past two years. Your parents must be very proud of you. __If they were here to see you, I'd bet they'd have a heck of a smile. Your grandmother told me of your new adventures this week. I won't tell you what to do. You're a smart kid. You know what's right from wrong. You can make your own choices now. You're a teenager, even if it's hard for me to admit it. You'll be on your way out of Hogwarts before you know it. Keep your head up high, no matter what people tell you. You're special, remember that. I will always be here for you. Keep up the good work, stay in Hogwarts (it's hard when you've been expelled), and keep safe. Hope you have a happy weekend at Hogsmeade. Write back if you've got the time._

_Harry_

Teddy folded Harry's letter and shoved it into his pocket. He didn't want to admit the fact that Harry's letter made him feel lighthearted. Harry never criticizes him. He never says a word about his pranks. Teddy clung onto Harry's every word in his letters, though he would never admit he does. _Keep your head up high_. That's what Harry told him.

Out of the blue, little Victoire Weasley walked up to him. Teddy and Victoire rarely talked. "Are you all right?" Victoire asked. Teddy was sort of stunned. He and Victoire used to be playmates, but this all stopped when Teddy turned seven. _Too rough_, Bill always said. They had never gotten to get together much from then on. "You look sad." Teddy gazed into Victoire's eyes. "Why do you always look so lonely?" she asked.

_Lonely_. It was a word Teddy could never really understand. He felt it ever so often, though he never shows it. Pranks are the best medicines to loneliness. It takes away every negative feeling Teddy has inside him as he laughed. No one would ever understand this. No one would ever know that behind his happy-go-lucky attitude is a scared boy wanting badly to be held and to be told that everything would turn out all right.

"I don't," said Teddy. He looked at Victoire. He could still remember her laughter from before when the both of them tore across the parks yelling their heads of…playing as if they were friends. Teddy turned around. "I have a lot of things to do. Why don't you grab your dolls and go play somewhere, kid," he said coolly.

Victoire looked at him for a moment. "You'll never find friends this way," she warned him. "I miss the old Teddy Lupin who used to bring a smile on my face. What happened to him?" Teddy didn't answer. Victoire shook her head. "If you don't want anyone to find join your little world even though they want to, you'll end up with no one in the end." Victoire walked away.

Teddy wanted so badly to turn around, call Victoire, and cry. He wanted so badly to talk to her like he used to. But that was so long ago that it seemed like a distant memory to him. He had forgotten Victoire's smile and laughter, though all he could remember was she made him forget that there was a world out there that was hurting him. He stood there, hoping and praying that Victoire would come back, but she didn't. He wanted to turn and run to her, but his pride wouldn't let him.

**And I'll never be what you want me to be.**

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**A/N: I know I've got bad grammar and I try to watch out for it. English is not my first language. Sorry, but sometimes I've really got bad grammar even with spell-check on word. Hope you understand.**

**Please review. Thanks**


	5. Best Birthday Gift

**A/N: ****Thank you to the reviewers: Aly Martin, Saoden, Spadetastic, and mimosa! You guys have been great for reviewing my stories. I really appreciate it. Thanks for the encouragement.**

**Please review this one! Hope you enjoy!  
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_**July 2012**_

Teddy hated summers. He's got no one to pull pranks on. He couldn't do such to his grandmother who is an inch away from disowning him. Without another alternative, Teddy shut himself off from the world, not wanting anyone to break down the walls he built up around him. Teddy, after all, had gotten used to being alone and apart from _human beings_ because he _is _a werewolf's son. He didn't need so much reminding from his schoolmates to remember that.

A knock came to the door. "Ted, can I come in?" Teddy rolled his eyes and buried his face on his pillow. It was Ginny, just as he expected. Ginny pushed open the door. She looked at Teddy for a while. "We're going to celebrate Harry's birthday soon and we'd like you to be there." Teddy didn't respond. Ginny looked at him thoughtfully. "We try to understand you, Ted…" she said, her voice fading away.

**And what do you think you'd understand?**

Teddy bubbled in fury inside him when Ginny said this. How could they possibly understand? The world wouldn't possibly understand him. Even Harry doubted him a lot of times; he just never expressed that doubt. Everyone doesn't understand why he never wanted to visit his parents' graves. Everyone couldn't understand why he had to build these walls around him. They didn't understand why he had to look tough. No one could understand why he wanted to wither away without anyone noticing.

He couldn't express his anger. Everyone would think him crazier than he already is. He tried to face the world emotionless instead. No one would ever care what he felt anyway. Everyone tried to reason out every thought of his. No one seemed to just listen to him, to just tell him it's all right to have these feelings. Maybe because he's a werewolf's son so everyone thinks of him as irrational, even his godfather.

"Harry wanted you to be there," said Ginny. Teddy stirred, but he didn't look at Ginny. "He didn't see you last year. He was hoping you'd come this year." Ginny walked over to Teddy. She gently sat down on his bed. "Nothing lasts forever. There will come a time when Harry won't be there even if you wanted him to. He's tried coming here a few times but he said he didn't want to force you f you didn't want to see him. He's really worried about you. There are nights when he wouldn't sleep because he thought about you," she informed Teddy.

Teddy turned and looked at Ginny. "Really?" Ginny nodded. Teddy felt instant guilt. He knows well that Harry loved him and wanted to understand. Harry had always been there for him when he needed him. He never said he had no time. Throughout the years growing up, Harry never shunned him away. Teddy's heart ached finding out that Harry had sleepless nights because of him. Teddy evaded Ginny's eyes. _Cold. _He had to be cold. He knew he wouldn't survive if he acted like a child and bawled like a baby, even if he wanted to. "He's got a choice whether to sleep or not."

"I don't know what happened to the Teddy Lupin I held in my arms thirteen years ago, that Christmas," said Ginny, She stood up and shook her head. "I don't even want to think of it. You just pity yourself when you shouldn't be. More people lived worse lives than you." She walked to the door. "I don't know why Harry even tries to come by. I can see that all his efforts would be worthless, knowing that you wouldn't listen to anything anyway."

Ginny closed the door. Teddy stood up. He made sure Ginny Apparated away before letting his angry tears flow. He banged his fists on his wall. He didn't understand why he had to feel so _alone_. He knew everyone wanted to help him, but he was confused. His heart was torn apart from wanting to stay who he is and wanting to change _for the better_.

"Damn it!" Teddy kicked hi bedside table, causing his parents' picture to fall. It had always been there and putting it aside would hurt his grandmother. Teddy picked it up and threw it across the room. "Why did you even have me when you had no plan of staying?" he yelled. Angry tears. They were as angry as ever. "Why did you let this happen to me? Werewolves don't _breed_, Dad. You were smart, they said! Why didn't you have that sense in you?" Teddy didn't understand his anger.

After all, he had everything any Hogwarts student could have. He had the best grades in his year. He knew spells past his year. He could do essays in three hours when it takes the others three days. He could do no studying and pass the tests with flying colors. He could fly like his godfather did (because it was Harry who taught him how to ride a broom). He could aim the Bludger better than anyone at any angle. He had everything.

"Screw you! Screw you!" Teddy walked over to his parents' picture. He turned and looked at it. They were holding him. Tears flowed uncontrollably. "Why did you go to battle? Why did you die? You could've been here to…" his voice faded as he gripped the picture in anger and longing. He turned and threw the picture to his bed. "I hate you!"

The door flew open. "What's the noise up-" His grandmother saw the tears in Teddy face even though he had tried to quickly wipe it. Andromeda looked sideways and saw the picture frame chipped. "You don't have to take it out on that picture. It is one of the few memories you will have of them," she said calmly. She walked to him and was about to give her grandson a hug when he took a step back.

"I don't want to remember anything about them!" exclaimed Teddy. His hair turned black, the color of his sadness. "You won't understand. I hate them! They're the worst people on earth. I hate them!" Teddy shook his head and ran past his grandmother. He raced down the staircase and out the door. He ran to the broom shed and frantically grabbed his broom and mounted it. "I hate them!" he said to himself as he kicked off the ground to fly.

The sky is his only friend. It calmed him down. It gave him happiness when he felt terrible. Teddy held out his hand to feel the wind. His tears dried there and he felt peaceful from some reason. Everything seemed to stop. The world wouldn't be able to reach him up here. He would be alone, just as always, but happy.

Teddy decided to go to Harry's party. He did miss his godfather. Harry was the only person who never stopped believing in him. He was the only person who hadn't given up on him. He knew Ginny was right. Nothing lasts forever. One say Harry's going to get tired of him to, and leave him, just like everyone else had done in his life. A great example was his parents.

"I'm happy to se you here." Teddy looked at Harry. He looked tired. "I just got home from work, but I'm really glad to see you. I thought I wouldn't again this year." Harry was about to hug Teddy, but he stopped. He held out his hand instead. "I know you're not a boy anymore. You're a man now," he said. "Let's shake instead."

**I'm a boy, no, I'm a man**

Teddy shook Harry's hand. He slightly smiled. "Thanks, Harry. Happy birthday." He did want Harry embrace him, but he couldn't ask for it. He wanted to throw his arms around his godfather, the way he did when he was younger. For some reason, being with Harry made him feel less angry and bitter towards his surrounding.

"Everything all right in school? Friends treat you well?" Harry asked. Teddy wanted to point out that he didn't have friend, but decided against it. He just nodded. Harry smiled at him and thumped his back. "I'm very proud of you for holding your head up high. I hear you get the best grades in your batch. Your parents would've been very proud of you," he said. "Come on, let's go inside. The lot's waiting for us in there." Harry couldn't take his eyes off of Teddy. The last time he saw him this friendly was when they walked to Diagon Alley to buy his wand.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY, HARRY POTTER!" Harry smiled. Everyone wad there. Ron sent sparks in the air, outlining Harry's face. Harry beamed. His children ran to him and gave him a hug and a kiss. Ginny was the last to kiss him and she did it very passionately in front of everyone. The crowd cheered wildly.

Teddy watched from one side. He knew his godfather's story. He had also been left alone by his parents. Even worse, he was sent to live with his Muggle relatives who gave his life hell. Not only that, Harry had so much responsibility on his shoulders. Some people hated him too. He heard about Harry being teased, especially during his fourth year when he became the fourth Triwizard Champion. He could not understand how Harry could be so happy, so care-free. He watched as Harry thanked his friends and family. His smile was genuine. Teddy envied him. How could he?

"I'm glad you make it, Teddy." Teddy spun and saw Ron standing behind him. "Harry was hoping you'd come. He had been talking about you the whole week and worrying that you wouldn't. You just gave him the best gift there is." Ron ruffled Teddy's hair. Teddy pulled away from him. Ron couldn't help but smile. "Don't forget. You're part of Harry's family. You're like a son to him. Without you on special occasions, he would be upset." Ron jerked his head towards Harry's direction. "Look at how happy he is," he pointed out.

Teddy looked away from Ron. "It's not only me. Everyone's here too. How could you be so sure that he's happy because of me?" It was a dumb question. Teddy knew well that if there's anyone who knew Harry, it would be Ron. Ron was his best friend forever. Another pang of jealousy came over Teddy. Harry had Ron and Hermione with him while he had no one to stand by him at all. "He's always happy."

Ron shook his head. "No, not always. There were birthdays that you weren't here and he wasn't as jolly. Like I said, you are like his son. Look," said Ron as he pointed towards the Potters' mantle. Teddy turned and saw his picture between James's and Albus's. "You're the best gift this year. Knowing Harry, he'd want to have you over." Ron thumped Teddy's back. "I'm just happy you made Harry's week. It's been tough for him lately."

"Why?" Teddy asked curtly.

"Because," started Ron, "work has been tiring lately at our department. Everyone's trying to kill Harry for answers. Even rumors about him are starting to spread." Ron sighed. "It's going to be a hell of a month, maybe even a year. People just don't get that he also has a family to go home to. He can't work twenty-four seven. It's not easy to sit on the top, especially if it's Harry." Ron looked at Teddy. "I know you understand it well. Harry says you sit on the top of your level too. Congratulations."

Teddy blinked. "Thank you," he replied. He never knew that Harry was getting so much pressure lately. He hadn't heard any rumors about his godfather yet. Maybe because he never really went out with anyone too. Ron walked away. Teddy's eyes shifted to Harry who was still thanking everyone for coming to his party. Maybe that was why Harry looked more tired than ever when he met him outside the house.

"Teddy Lupin!" Teddy spun and saw Victoire behind him. "I didn't know you were coming." Teddy stared at her. A funny feeling came over to him. It wasn't anger or bitterness, his usually feelings. It felt different. It was something he never felt before. He felt it now as he stared at Victoire. Victoire gave him a sweet smile. "I'm glad you came." She took Teddy's hand. "Let's go to the table. We can eat together."

Teddy let Victoire pull him. She kept on talking, but he didn't hear her. He couldn't keep her eyes off of her. He hadn't seen Victoire this casual in a long time. He had never seen Victoire wear a tight dress like she currently wore. She had never let her hair down like this either. She looked different to him. He couldn't take his eyes off of her.

"Are you even listening to me, Teddy?" Teddy looked at Victoire. Victoire's face eased. "You're always so spaced out, even in school." She handed him a glass of pumpkin juice. "I was wondering if you could teach me Herbology. I know you're really good at it, but I'm having a lot of trouble. Mum teaches me, but apparently it would be hard for her when we go to school. So can you?" she asked.

Teddy hesitated, but then said, "Sure." Victoire smiled again. Teddy's hear pounded for some reason when she did. She looked more beautiful than he had ever seen him. Teddy grabbed a piece of bread and began to nip it still staring at Victoire.

James spotted the pair talking. He looked at Teddy who was still goggling at Victoire. He looked at Ginny. "Mum," he muttered as he tugged on her robes. Ginny looked back at him. James pointed to Teddy and Victoire. "How come Teddy's staring at Victoire as if he's going to melt her? Victoire could really melt!" he cried.

Ginny looked at the pair and smiled. "You watch too much Muggle movies. Honestly, your father takes you to the mall too much." She pulled James. "Come on, let's entertain some guests." It was the first time in a long time that Ginny had seen Teddy actually talk in a party. Usually he's just sit around and wait for it to end. Maybe, just maybe, Victoire could make Teddy feel something he thought he didn't have. She had seen that look in a boy's eyes before. Teddy was now in love.

"Really?" Victoire threw her head back. Her hair danced in front of Teddy's eyes. "I can't be that good at Herbology. I almost failed it last year." Teddy just looked at her. Victoire laughed. "You still look spaced out," she said, "but I'm starting to like you again. Talk more often like this when we get back at Hogwarts, all right?"

**Yo****u can take me and throw me away**

Teddy felt sorry that the party had to end. He watched as Victoire and her family left the house. Everyone started going away. Teddy plopped himself onto the sofa. He looked around. The room was kind of a mess. His eyes searched for Harry and Ginny. They looked pretty tired already. He had to do it once in a while. Teddy stood up and started picking up the trash that was around the house.

"You don't have to do that, Ted. I'll be at that in a while," said Harry as he saw Teddy.

In a long time, a very long time, Teddy did what was least expected of him that night. Teddy smiled. "It's all right. I had a share of the trash around here too." Though it wasn't true because Teddy hated trash lying around even at his house. He'd prefer them in the trash bin where it belonged. "Just stay there. I'll be done in a moment," he assured Harry.

Harry felt his chest lighten. He never thought he'd see the day where Teddy would be this calm. Ginny touched his arm. He looked at her and nodded. The pair watched as Teddy went around cleaning the whole living room. Truly, it was the best gift Harry had gotten this year.

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**A/N: I'm going to be out on a vacation soon so I might not update until I come back. If I find a computer and internet somewhere though, I will. Thanks for understanding. **


	6. Broken

**A/N: ****Thank you to the reviewers: Spadetastic, mare12a, mimosa, Saoden and those other who enjoyed the last chapter and put it on alert or faves. Thanks so much for the encouragement! **

**Hope you enjoy this one!  
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_**November**__** 2012**_

"Don't be silly," said Victoire as she pulled on Teddy's arm. "Come on. You can show me, can't you? You're supposed to have control of it by now." Her eyes sparkled as her eyes lay on Teddy's face. "Come on, Teddy, please? I want to see you change. I think it's wonderful that you've inherited your mother's skill!" she exclaimed.

Teddy frowned. "I can't do what you say," he said quickly.

"Why?" asked Victoire. Her excitement died down as she looked at Teddy's pale face. She looked at him willfully. "I just want to see it, like the last time. You showed me something cool with your hair. I asked Dad and he reckons you can do it with your face too. Please, Teddy?"

**And how can you learn what's never shown?**

Teddy couldn't admit to her that he couldn't control his Metamorphagus state yet. His insides told him to not answer rather than tell her the truth. She'd never understand anyway. It's not easy trying to figure out how to control it. Hogwarts doesn't teach one how to, since his kind is very rare. If ever Teddy changed the shape of his face, it was all by chance and he had no clue how he did it. No matter how hard he tried to learn, he couldn't.

"No," replied Teddy. He turned around. "We have better things to do. Don't bother asking for anything trivial. Your mother always taught you that time is gold, didn't she? How could you be so stupid?" He knew that Victoire felt upset as he walked away from her, but he didn't know what else to do. He wanted so much to make her smile, if only he could.

Two Gryffindor walked past Teddy. One of them laughed. "You must be a fagot. Only fagots make girls cry." Teddy froze. He spun and looked at the Gryffindor girl who said it. "Don't look innocent with me. I don't know what you said to Victoire, but she was crying when we walked past her, only to find you walking the other way." She shook her head. "I don't really care how smart you are, but you can be an _ass_, don't you think?"

Teddy turned and ran for Victoire. His hear started to beat fast. Victoire is the only friend he had in Hogwarts and he didn't want to lose her too. She had always been a good friend to him and she's the only one who tried to understand him when the other people wouldn't. It was that night they became close friends that ran through his mind as he chased after Victoire. It was one of his happiest memories. It was one that he wanted to treasure most about Victoire.

_"How do you do this, Teddy?" asked Victoire as she laid her homework in front of Teddy who lazily looked at it. Victoire __pushed the parchment towards __Teddy. "Come on, Teddy. Are you going to help me or not? __I'm not high-all mighty genius like you are. I'm having a hard time and I'm not like you who can lean back and stare at it.__" _

_Teddy looked at her. "You can't?"_

_Victoire rolled her eyes. __"I wouldn't be asking for your help if I could." She looked at Teddy. Teddy thought that she was getting annoyed by him, but he was surprised to find a smile on her face. __"Come on, Teddy. __If only you were a bit less arrogant I would have been done with this ages ago and we'd go somewhere we could pull pranks," she said. _

_"Victoire Weasley and pranks don't match," countered Teddy as he studied __Victoire's parchment. "Let's see. If you read your book for chapters three and four I doubt you'd have a hard time in this." Victoire sighed. Teddy knew how much she hated reading. He walked to the couch and took Victoire's book. "Come here. I'll teach you how to read."_

_Victoire slightly scowled. "I can read, Teddy," she said. _

_Teddy shook his head and motioned for Victoire to seat beside her. "No, you don't understand. I'll teach you how to read." Victoire sat beside him, looking puzzled. __Teddy held up the book in front of their faces. __"Here, Victoire. __You read like this. Skip the middle parts. One, they bore us to death and __two;__ we don't really need them at all. __All you need is this," said Teddy as he pointed to the first two paragraphs, "and this." Teddy pointed to the last three paragraphs. _

_Victoire read them silently. She looked at her homework. "You're right," she murmured. She wrote the answer to the questions. __She looked at Teddy and smiled. "Thank you." To Teddy's surprise and delight, Victoire leaned on him. "I'm done. __Why don't we go do what you love best?" she said, her eyes sparkling at Teddy. _

_"What is it?" Teddy asked. _

_"Pranks?" Victoire suggested. _

_Teddy smiled, but he shook his head. "Not when I'm with you," he said. Victoire raised her eyebrows. __Teddy stood up. He took her hand. "Come on, I'll show you something," he said as he pulled Victoire into following him. __Victoire ran behind Teddy. __Teddy looked at his watch. They still had time. "You're going to love it there," he whispered. _

_"What is it?" asked Victoire. She almost tripped, but Teddy had a firm hold of her so she didn't. __Victoire and Teddy ran up the flight of stairs to the owelry. "Teddy Lupin, don't tell me you're going to send a letter to __whomever__ at this time of night. It isn't practical. __Why don't we just send it tomorrow?" she asked as they entered the room. _

_Teddy looked at her. "I'm__ not going to send any letters." He led Victoire to the windowsill. __Th__e owls fluttered. Some had already been sleeping and were disturbed. "__Look outside," said Teddy softly as he pointed to the starry sky. "Isn't it beautiful up here?"_

_Victoire's eyes shifted from one star to another. "It's the best sight I've ever seen," she __said. She looked at Teddy. "Do you always __come up here?" she asked. Teddy nodded. "Alone?" Teddy nodded once again. __Victoire's eyes softened. "What are you thinking about when you come up here?"_

_Teddy thought for a moment. "What I've been doing with my life," he replied. __"I've always been thinking about my parents too. __I hate Hogwarts. They don't understand. It's the place where my parents died. __Of course I want to be expelled." He slammed his hands on the windowsill. __"Sometimes I don't understand why I try to keep good grades. It isn't easy getting them. Some people think I have a natural talent, but…" his voice faded slowly. _

_"But what?" said Victoire. _

_Teddy sighed. "But sometimes I have dreams about my parents." He tried not to cry in front of Victoire. He had been doing a lot of wishful thinking about his parents lately. __"They told me that I should do my best at least at some things. They told me how happy they were when I studied for my lessons. They told me how proud they were when I fly well on my games. Studying and flying are the two things kept me going on.__I don't know how to do Charms. __I hate Transfiguration because it drives me nuts. I don't study during the day. I study at night. That's why I fall asleep in class. I__'m always alone. I have to do this alone I don't have anyone__…__" _

**Yeah, you stand here on your own.**

_"Don't," said Victoire. __Teddy looked at her. He was more than surprised to find her crying. Victoire leaned on Teddy's chest and buried her face there. "Don't scare me like that. __Don't talk like that. __I don't want to see you sad. I never do. __I didn't mean for you to feel this badly. I never knew you felt like this." __She looked up at Teddy. "You'll never be alone again. I'm here. You can talk to me anytime."_

Teddy felt his heart pound fast as he ran. He looked at every hallway trying to find Victoire. He had never before cared for someone he hurt, not even girls. He didn't think himself as a fagot. He just likes to tell other people how badly he hurts when they call him a werewolf, but they never seem to get it. Victoire is the one and only person who had never rejected him in school. She was the only one who understood her. Teddy couldn't believe he called her _stupid_.

"Vicky!" Teddy yelled when he finally found her. She was walking down the hallway with her books pressed tightly to her chest. Teddy caught up with her. "Vicky, I really didn't mean to. Here's the truth, I don't know how to control it. Everything I do is by chance, except for my hair. I know I've got a long way to go in learning." Victoire walked on as if she didn't hear anything. "Look, Vicky, I'm sorry. What do you want me to do?" he asked.

"Go away," said Victoire. Teddy stopped walking. It was plain and simple. He watched Victoire disappear into the corner. Victoire had never been that cold towards him. She had been very annoyed once in a while, but she never acted that cold.

Teddy took two steps back. He felt his chest ache. He didn't understand what was going on in him. He had never said sorry to anyone before, not even to his grandmother whom he knew he wronged so many timed. Teddy had never felt even more rejected. All he wanted at the moment was shrink and disappear. Life was over, or so he felt.

Victoire didn't talk to him for the rest of the day. Although Teddy tried to talk to her, Victoire simply walked away. Everyone somehow noticed this and started spreading rumors about what could have happened between the two. Rumors got bad…to worse. There were some rumors he could bare with, like being werewolves. There were some that just had hit bellow the belt.

"Did you know that Ted Lupin must've bitten Victoire and made her a werewolf? That girl can be weird hanging out with him. The Weasleys, you know. Most of them aren't in the right mind. Blood-traitors, you know, as my family calls them." They had gone too far according to Teddy. Teddy grabbed the Slytherin boy's collar and banged him to the wall. The surprised Slytherin simply stared while Teddy's head steamed.

"You," Teddy began, "will never talk about Victoire or the Weasleys." Professor Longbottom held the yelling, but he stopped before he could be visible to both boys. "They might be blood-traitors to you but they are worth more than _you _could be. The Weasleys have an open mind in everything and all of them are more successful than your family will _ever_ be! Do I see your parents working for the top position of the Auror department like Ron Weasley does? Do I see your parents be the head of the curse-breakers in Egypt like Victoire's dad is? From what I can see is your father _works _for Percy Weasley in the Ministry of International Cooperation."

The Slytherin boy sneered. "Well, even if you say that, what are you to them?" Teddy gripped the boy's collar tighter. He pushed the boy more to the wall. Teddy could feel his anger rise above his head. He knew what the boy would say next and he didn't want to hear it. He doesn't need any reminding of it. "You are _not_ part of that family and you will never be"

Professor Longbottom decided that this will be the end of the line. "What has been happening here?" he asked as he neared the two boys. He looked at the Slytherin boy who had a face of triumph all over. He then looked at Teddy who looked lost and even more confused than he had ever seen him. "Lupin, let go of him," said Professor Longbottom clearly. Teddy slowly let go of the Slytherin boy's collar. "I want you both in detention tonight. Lupin, you come with me."

"It wasn't my fault, he provoked me!" protested Teddy angrily as he walked off with Professor Longbottom. He didn't know why the world seemed always so unfair to him. Even if he does do the right thing, he always ends up getting into trouble. That's why he never wanted to do anything right, really. It's easier, more fun, and has the same results when he does something right anyway.

To Teddy's surprise, Professor Longbottom said, "I know, Ted." Teddy looked at Professor Longbottom. He must be dreaming to have heard this from the man who almost always gives him one of those long dragging fatherly lectures about keeping out of trouble. "I know how you feel. Trust me. Things aren't always what you think it is. Sometimes, you have to pay the consequences even if you're right. We did." Professor Longbottom looked at the hall aimlessly. "Me, Harry, Ron, the others who fought in battle; like your parents. We did something right but it caused us consequences. Life isn't all do bad get punished do good get reward. You have to know that." Professor Longbottom stopped for a while. He looked at Teddy. "And don't worry, you are part of the family in the eyes of the Weasleys." Professor Longbottom left without another word.

Teddy turned and saw Victoire standing behind him. She was looking straight at him for some reason. She must have heard the run in with the Slytherin boy. Teddy could see she was torn between hating him and thanking him. Her mouth quivered.

"You can continue hating me if you want. If you can't even decide whether I'm your friend or not, then maybe I'm not." It hurt Teddy to say this. He looked at Victoire for a moment. She was as if frozen in her own thoughts. Teddy sadly shook his head and turned to walk away. As he did for the second time, he knew he was right this time.

He felt broken. He looked at the ceiling and wished that somewhere his parents would just appear and tell him that everything was going to be all right. He felt like a little boy wanting to run to his grandmother as of the moment. But his parents are gone. He isn't a little boy anymore and he knew this. Teddy walked along the hallway, trying to hold his head up high, even if no one saw him.

**They don't know me 'cause I'm not here**

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**A/N: Thank you for the reviews. Hoe to see you at the next chapter. **


	7. What Would've Been

**A/N: ****Thank you to the reviewers! Thanks for the support and encouragement! **

**I hope you enjoy this one!  
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_**June 2013**_

The Hogwarts Express came to a top. Teddy hopped off the trunk. He had asked his grandmother not to pick him up anymore. He knew his way home anyway. Teddy took a deep breath and gathered up his things as he was ready to go home. He looked around as he walked. Parents came for their children. _Parents_, not grandparents. It was one of the reasons he asked his grandmother to stay at home. Selfish, yes, but it will save him from a lot of mockery next year.

"Ted Lupin!" Teddy turned. He saw Ron smiling at him. "I was wondering when I'd catch you. I'm waiting for Victoire. Bill couldn't make it so he asked me to pick her up. She's been writing to us a lot about you. She told us she passed all her lessons because you taught her how to read." Ron tilted his head. "I bet you're a great teacher because Vicky was in a major trouble at that time," he explained.

Teddy blinked. "She was?" Ron nodded. Teddy smiled faintly. "I guess she passed then." Teddy's hair turned yellow, the color of the sun. Every time he heard good news his hair would turn yellow. Teddy pulled his things closer to him. "Grammy's waiting for me at home. I'm excited to go home," he lied. He wasn't excited to go home, really, if he had any home to go to.

"All right," said Ron. "Come by later. We're going to have a picnic. Harry would be glad to see you. His hands are just tied with work as f the moment," he said. Ron saw Victoire coming down from the train. "I see her. You don't want to come with us? I'm sure your grandmother would understand you dropping by first," he said. Teddy shook his head. Ron nodded understandingly. "All right, off you go then. Be careful when crossing."

Teddy walked alone through the barrier. He saw a couple of students he knew roam around King's Cross, all of them with their parents. Teddy's hair turned dull black again. He didn't even bother trying to turn it back to yellow. He felt down every time people around him look so happy. Teddy took a deep breath and walked home…alone.

**And I want a moment to be real**

"Teddy!" Andromeda threw her arms around Teddy. Teddy let go of his things and hugged her back. For some reason, he wanted to hold on to her as badly as she wanted him. When they finally let go, Andromeda took Teddy's arms by the hand and looked at him. "You have grown another inch, haven't you?" She smiled widely. "You have your mother's eyes, your father's nose, and your mother's ears," she said as she studied Teddy's face. "As handsome as ever too," Andromeda added.

Teddy feigned a smile. "Thanks, Grammy." He took his things and headed up to his room. Andromeda watched him as he carried his trunk. "I'll be in my room if you need me. I'm tired. I guess I'll skip dinner tonight," he said and headed to his room. When he got there, he used magic to fix his things. Andromeda allowed him to do so, but only so that far. Teddy plopped himself on his bed and closed his eyes. He never wanted to think about school again for a long time.

Accidentally, Teddy bumped his bedside table, causing the picture frame to fall. Teddy sat up and picked the picture frame up. He looked at his family picture. He could remember how much it hurt to look at it before, but he felt a lot calmer as he watched his parents holding him now. It was something he wished that they could still do. Teddy ran his fingers through the photo. His parents smiling at him was something special, something he wanted to last for a lifetime.

"I just wish you can be proud of me," whispered Teddy. He looked at the baby version of himself. He smiled a little, knowing that his parents had the chance to hold him. He wanted so badly to have his parents near him at the moment. He didn't understand why. He just did. "I wish you were here to pick me up at King's Cross and just…" He gazed into his parents eyes. "…love me."

**Wanna touch things I don't feel**

A knock came to his door. Teddy quickly set aside the photo and looked up. Andromeda entered the room with milk and a tray of cookies. She set them on Teddy's desk. Teddy stood up and walked over to get one. His grandmother's cookies were the best, most especially if he had milk to dunk them into. Andromeda never fails to cheer him up.

"You've grown a lot," said Andromeda quietly. Teddy looked at him. "You've grown up to be a lot like your mother, very independent, she was. She rarely asked me to pick her up at King's Cross too, if it wasn't for her father who insisted upon it. He said she ought not to grow up too soon." Andromeda stroked Teddy's hair. He was a lot taller than her now, so she could barely reach it, but she did still want to stroke it just as she did when Teddy was younger. "You are as brave as your father was too, for holding your head up even when people put you down."

Teddy didn't know how his grandmother found out. He never told her about people putting him down, well, not since he was seven anyway. He looked inside her big, proud eyes and found assurance of love in them. Teddy knew that he had no reason to grumble since he has this very loving grandmother to take good care of him.

There was a knock at the front door. Andromeda and Teddy went downstairs. Teddy answered the door and before he knew it, the three Potter kids came dancing into the house. Harry looked at Teddy and smiled at him. Teddy smiled back. He was glad to see Harry. He didn't want to admit it, but Harry did help him a lot every time he felt alone in Hogwarts. The thought of Harry making it through even without parents made him feel a lot stronger. Harry's letter helped even more.

"You've grown," said Harry. Teddy closed the door behind him as Harry stepped in. Harry looked at Andromeda. "I'm sorry I had to bring the kids. They wanted to see Teddy and Ginny wasn't in the house to take care of them anyway." Andromeda shook her head with a smile. She went upstairs to get the tray of cookies. "Hey Teddy, how was the school year?" asked Harry as he turned to his godson.

Teddy shrugged. "Still the same I guess." He and Harry headed to the couch. James, Albus, and Lily crowded them as they sat. Lily jumped to Teddy's lap. Teddy laughed and gave her a hug. "I missed you too, Lily Potter," he said. James looked at Teddy. Teddy ruffled his hair. "You too, James. You're growing up so fast. Why don't I teach you to ride the broom this summer?" he asked. James beamed.

Harry nodded. "That's a great idea. Thanks, Teddy," he said. Teddy nodded with a smile. He didn't have anything to do anyway. Harry carried Albus into his lap. James sat beside Teddy. Harry leaned back on the couch. "Anything interesting at Hogwarts this year?" he asked.

As Andromeda came downstairs, Teddy turned to the fireplace. There was no fire there now. Summer had finally come. He didn't want to look at Harry because he didn't want Harry to see his eyes soften. Every end of the school term, Harry would come over and ask him about his term. He felt happy because of this. He felt like a son being asked by a father.

"It went okay," replied Teddy, still not looking at Harry. "I still have the highest grade in my level. Hufflepuff on the House cup because of me." James snorted. Teddy flashed a look at him. James turned away. "We won the Quidditch Cup though. Very close fight between Gryffindor and Ravenclaw, but we won it. I'm taking OWLs this year too," he said.

Harry nodded. "Yes, I believe that's true. You're going to do much better than I did, though." Harry looked at Teddy. Teddy finally looked back at him. "I have full confidence in you. Remus has certainly passed a lot of his brains to you so I know you will do well and get all O's there." Harry thumped Teddy's back. "Make us proud."

Andromeda set the tray of cookies and five glasses of milk on the coffee table. The three Potters pounced on the cookies as if there was no tomorrow. The adults and Teddy laughed at the sight. Being the eldest and the one who was almost always hungry, James bit off more than he could chew, literally, and almost choked. Teddy found it entertaining when the boy turning blue, alarming Harry.

Harry looked at Teddy. "We're going to the Muggle mall this weekend. I was hoping you'd come with us. It's been a long time since you last came with us." Teddy looked at his milk. Every time the Potters went to the mall, they went as a family. Ever since Teddy knew the definition of a family: consisting of a father, a mother, and the kids; he stopped going out with them. He wasn't part of the Potters, evident from his family name.

"No thanks," replied Teddy. "There's a lot of homework to do this summer since they're preparing us for the next term." It wasn't a lie. The homework they gave were piles of it. Though, being Teddy, he could do it in less than a week and idle off his time. "Besides, I want to catch up on my reading this weekend. You know, so I won't lag behind in school."

Harry sighed, but nodded. "All right, it that's what you want." He looked at the Lupins' photo that hung on the wall above the fireplace. "I guess you'd rather spend your weekend with you family, huh?" Harry smiled at Teddy. "Your parents would be very proud of you if they're here. They would've been really, really proud. To have a son like you is very rare." Harry ruffled Teddy's hair. "I'll see you two weeks from now on Victoire's birthday party," he said. Harry stood up. "Come on, kids, it's time to go." James stuffed the last piece of cookie into his mouth. Harry turned to Andromeda. "Thank you," he said and headed out the door with James complaining that he wanted more of Andromeda's cookies.

Teddy looked at his parents' picture. He looked sideways as his grandmother busied herself in the kitchen. He imagined for a moment what life would be if only his parents were alive.

**Wanna hold on and feel I belong**

_"There he is," squealed Tonks as she saw Teddy come down from the train. __She and Lupin walked up to their son. __Tonks gave him a hug. "Welcome home, Teddy." Teddy hugged her back with a smile. Tonks studied her son's face. "I'm really proud of you for staying at the top of your batch. Surely you have gotten your father's brains," she said. _

_Lupin looked at her. "You have a stroke of genius yourself, my dear," he reminded her. He looked at Teddy and ruffled his hair. "What's with the pink? I thought you hated pink." __Teddy grinned back mischievously. Lupin clicked his tongue as he levitated Teddy's trunk to the ground. "I hope you didn't get more detentions than House points this year," he said. _

_"I did," Teddy replied. Lupin sighed, but he didn't look disappointed. They walked through the barrier. Teddy walked between his parents proudly. __He looked at his father. "Hey Dad, did you know that even though we didn't win the House Cup, we did get the Quidditch Cup. Professor Longbottom congratulated me twice when we did. I hit the Bludger right at the Seeker and made him unconscious, though I didn't do anything illegal," he added quickly as his mother gave him a stern look. _

_When they got home, Teddy ran to the living room and dropped himself to the couch. "Ah, home!" he exclaimed. Teddy looked at the family pictures sat on top of the fireplace, just as the Potters have on theirs. Teddy looked at his father who sat on the armchair in front of him. "It was a great term, Dad. I can't believe I'm starting OWLs next year," he said. _

_Lupin smiled at him. "Neither could I. In a couple of years, your mother and I won't be picking you up at King's Cross anymore." He leaned back on the armchair. "I am getting old, though it's hard to admit I am," he said. Teddy gave a little laugh. Lupin looked at his son. "So what are your plans when you graduate from Hogwarts? I know it's still far away, but it can't hurt to dream," he said casually. _

_Teddy thought for a moment. "Maybe an Auror," he said. His mother smiled when she heard it. She nodded approvingly. "Or…" Teddy added. Lupin leaned forward to hear his son's answer. He knew Teddy's future was bright since he tops his batch, gets good grades, __though there are problems with more detention than House points, Teddy wasn't doing that bad at school. Teddy eased his face and said, "Find a cure for werewolves even though they've been bitten for a long time and wasn't given the cure immediately."_

_Tonks and Lupin looked at him, speechless. Teddy blinked. "That's not too easy," said Lupin quietly. "There are a lot of things to do if you do that and you'll be moving from one place to another. Not to __mention you wouldn't be earning a Knut if you do that until you've found the cure. Besides, I do think being an Auror is a lot better."_

_Teddy looked at his father, deep into the eyes, and into the soul. "But Dad," he started, "there is more to life than just money, isn't it? Why can't I help you? Why can't I do things for you? You've done a lot for me. You've always been there for me. When I finish Hogwarts, I want to be there for you too. I can't watch innocent people, werewolves, become outcasts. It's not right," protested."_

_Lupin sighed. "I know it's not right, son." He calmly reached out for Teddy's shoulder and gently placed his hand on it. "Do what you think is best for you. No matter what happens, your mother and I will be right behind you whatever you choose to do." Tonks nodded. Her face showed full confidence as she looked at Teddy. "We're really proud of you, Ted."_

_Tonks waked up to them. She sat beside Teddy and placed her arm around him. "Yes, we are." She gave Teddy a light kiss on the temple. Teddy smiled at him. "You're the most precious thing that had ever happened in our lives. We hope you know that." Teddy nodded as he leaned on his mother. Tonks closed her eyes as she felt Teddy's warm body. "We love you so much, Teddy. Never forget that."_

Teddy blinked. He touched his face and found a tear on his eyes. He quickly wiped it away. He smiled as he left the living room. He didn't know why, but he felt very much loved at the moment as he walked up back to his room to study. Maybe, just maybe, he would one day become an Auror and be the man to find a cure for werewolves.

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**A/N: See you at the next chapter!  
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	8. Changes

**A/N: ****Thank you to the reviewers!! Really appreciate it!  
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_**July 2013**_

James rushed into the room. "Vicky! Vicky! Where are you?" he asked as he tore across the house in search for his cousin. He looked around and finally spotted Victoire out in the backyard. He burst through the back door and ran to her. "Victoire, have you heard?" Victoire turned and looked at James whose eyes were sparkling with excitement. She slowly shook her head. "Didn't he tell you? Teddy?" Victoire shook her head again. James smiled widely. "He's been made prefect!" he exclaimed.

Victoire blinked. She couldn't imagine that Teddy be made a prefect. For all the trouble he's caused at Hogwarts for the past five years? Maybe, she thought, there could have been a mistake. Teddy Lupin couldn't be prefect with his detention record…could he?

Bill walked out from the broom shed. "So Teddy Lupin has finally lived up to his name, didn't he?" he said smiling. He looked out his daughter who looked very much surprised. "Yes, Teddy's father had also been a prefect. Teddy might be a little rough on the edge, but once polished and given a little more responsibility, he might come back to his senses. I bet Harry's really jumping happy right now," he said as he looked at James.

James nodded vigorously. "Yep! Dad sent me here to invite you guys tonight. We're having party to celebrate Teddy's being made prefect." He looked happily at Victoire. "And you know what the best part is? Teddy taught me how to ride a broom yesterday. You should've seen him dive, Vicky! He could've been a Seeker if he wanted to."

James had always idolized Teddy, everyone knows that. Teddy acted as a big brother James never had. He always took care of the little guy. He spends time with James the most out of the three Potter kids and James is always by his side when Teddy goes over to the Potters to eat or just to hang out. Whenever something good happens to Teddy, James would be the happiest to spread the news.

**And how can the world want me to change**

Victoire and her family were one of the first to arrive at Godric's Hollow. Victoire spotted Teddy laughing happily with Harry and Ron. She wanted to go nearer, but she felt afraid that Teddy would just ignore her. The term ended badly for their friendship. Since that day when Teddy walked away from Victoire, they did not converse much. Only on occasions that they _had_ to is when they did.

"And then he said, _it's not going to work that way_," said Ron in a very funny voice that the crowd burst into laughter. Ron looked at Teddy. "Well, well, well, isn't the princess over there just staring at us?" Ron had spotted Victoire looking at them. Teddy looked up to look at Victoire. Victoire quickly looked away. "Come here, Vicky. Join us. We're having the best drink here. Don't worry, it's just pumpkin juice since Ted's too young to drink as well."

Teddy set down his glass. "Excuse me, I think I need to go to the bathroom right now," he said quickly and disappeared to the next room.

Victoire sighed heavily and shook her head. She walked away to the other direction. Ron and Harry exchanged puzzled looks. They hadn't heard a word about Victoire and Teddy not speaking to each other. They even thought the two were getting along. Ron went after Victoire while Harry went to see Teddy to find out what was going on.

Harry knocked on the bathroom door. "Are you all right, Ted?" he asked. Teddy didn't reply. Harry sighed and knocked again. "Ted, talk to me. It's your day today. This party is for you. Come on out." Teddy didn't reply again. Harry knocked at the door twice. "Ted, is there something we should talk about?" he asked.

Teddy turned on the faucet. He washed his face. He felt scared at the moment. He didn't want Victoire to stay angry at him forever. What he said that November night wasn't really to shove her off of his life. All he wanted to point out was that they could be better friends, better than they were. When he saw Victoire that night, he didn't know what else to think. She might still be angry with him because of what he said. He didn't know. He didn't want to know the truth because it might break him apart. He didn't want to be broken more than he already is.

"Ted, talk to me," Harry insisted. He looked at his watch. Soon, most of the visitors would be pouring in and celebrating with them. Harry took a deep breath. "Alohamora," he whispered. The door unlocked and Harry pushed it open. He found Teddy looking at himself at the mirror. Teddy looked up at Harry. "Ted, what's wrong? You know you can always talk to me when you've got something bothering you," he said calmly.

Teddy nodded. "I know," he replied. He splashed his face with cold water. He looked up at Harry and feigned a smile just as he always does when he wants the discussion to be over. "I'm all right now. Let's go back out there," he said and headed towards the door. Harry stopped him and blocked the doorway. "What is it, Harry?" said Teddy, trying to look _all right_.

"I know as much as you do that you're not all right," said Harry. "You can pretend all you want when you're out there. I can't blame you. I can't protect you from that. Out there is where you learn to stand on your own. In here, Teddy, you bring your heart. Home is where the heart is. What you feel, who you really are, bring them home." Harry looked at Teddy thoughtfully.

**They're the ones that stay the same**

Teddy looked at Harry. Harry didn't understand at all what he was saying. Teddy knew that Harry didn't understand why he could never be himself around the Potters. Harry didn't understand why he doesn't bring out his frustrations and hurts and real inward feelings when he comes around to visit. This isn't his home. Teddy knew deep inside that he didn't really have a home to go to. Where would he take his heart when he's got no home?

"You see me the way I'm standing right now," said Teddy. "Look, Harry. I'm not a little kid anymore. I can handle things on my own. If I need help, I know who to call. I'm okay." With a look of assurance, Teddy walked away from Harry hoping to have it over with.

Harry watched as Teddy joined back the crowd. He shook his head. He knew Teddy wasn't telling him everything. He never told Teddy, but he could see the pain and hurt in Teddy's eyes even through his smile. He could hear Teddy's cries. But unless Teddy himself is willing to let him know, there is nothing Harry could do. Harry knew that well. He'd been in Teddy's position too many times to not notice Teddy's actions.

"There you are!" Teddy smiled as Molly Weasley made her way through the crowd towards him. She gave Teddy a hug. "Look how you've grown. You're even taller than I am right now." Molly couldn't help but smile at him. Teddy smiled back. "Oh you've got the sweetest smile of all time, Ted. Your parents would've been really proud of you upon knowing that you've been made a prefect. You are very much like your father."

Teddy nodded. "Thank you, Mrs. Weasley," he said politely. Molly had been one of the most important people in Teddy's life. He could still remember than she babysat for him from time to time when his grandmother was sick and Harry was too busy to do so. She told him many stories about his father, all she knew about him. She was open to any question he asked. "Enjoy the meal. Ginny's made everything great tonight. I bet she learnt it all from you."

"Aw, flattery," Molly said, amused. "I am so sure you can get any girl with that sweet mouth of yours." She gave him another hug before joining some of her children in a conversation, particularly Percy and Charlie who were talking about planning on moving to Asia.

James caught Teddy's pants. "Teddy!" he exclaimed. Teddy turned and pulled James in a headlock. James laughed and tried to break free. Teddy held him tightly, but not too tight to hurt James. "That's unfair! You're stronger," said James. Teddy laughed as James tried to pull himself free from Teddy. Teddy finally let go. James stood up straight. "In three years I'll be in Hogwarts too." He frowned slightly. "Too bad you would've graduated by then," he added.

Teddy thought for a moment. "You're right. But you know what?" said Teddy. James shook his head and looked interested in what Teddy had to say. "I wouldn't be able to see what you're up to so Harry wouldn't be able to ask me if you were making trouble. Isn't that a good thing?" James's face lit when he realized this. He ran off happy.

Teddy looked around. He found everyone who filled the room very happy. Not only did the party serve as congratulations to Teddy, it also built a family reunion, especially for the Weasleys. Teddy was happy to see this. The Weasleys had been very kind to him many times. There were times, of course, when he disliked them, but they were kind to him overall.

"Come on now, come one now!" Teddy turned and saw Ron holding up his glass. Albus and Lily pushed Teddy to his side. Ron placed his hand on Teddy shoulder and raised his glass. "Fifteen years ago, Remus Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks got together and became Mr. and Mrs. Lupin. From that love they had comes one of the special people in our lives. He's someone you can trust secrets with. He never told Hermione that I took Rose on a broom ride when she was four-oops, I guess I said that one out too loud." Everyone in the room laughed. Hermione looked stern, but amused. "He's a great friend to us all. Wait, he's not just a friend to us. He's part of the family. When we heard the news fifteen years ago, Remus Lupin said something that I believe is very true." Ron smiled. "To Teddy Remus Lupin, a great wizard in the making."

The glasses clicked. Everyone went about merrily. Most shook Teddy's hand. Teddy was happy to see them very proud of him. He couldn't believe that he had actually made something out of himself. At that very moment as he looked at the eyes of those who cared most about him, who looked very proud of him, he was very much pleased.

As the merriment went about, Teddy felt something was missing. He tried to cover this void by not thinking about it, but his mind couldn't win over his heart. He perfectly knew what was missing even tough he tried to deny it: Victoire's presence.

**They don't know me**

"Hey Teddy, check this out," said James, snapping Teddy out from his thoughts. Teddy looked at James. About him stood his little cousins Rose and Hugo. James held out a paper boat. "I made it. It's amazing, see?" He threw the paper boat and it seemed to sail through the air. Teddy caught it and raised his eyebrow. James smiled. "Isn't it cool?" he said.

Teddy shook his head, but he smiled. "Yes it's cool," he said and handed the boat back to James. "Wait there. There's something I have to do," he said and walked around. He tried not to make people notice it, but he tried to find Victoire who seemed to not be in the house at all. Teddy went out of the house and into the garden. He saw Victoire looking at the stars. Teddy took a deep breath and walked towards her. "Victoire…" he whispered.

Surprisingly, Victoire turned. She had tears in her eyes. "How could you be so cold, Teddy Lupin?" she asked. Teddy looked away from her. His heart ached when he saw Victoire look so sad. "Look at me, Teddy!" Teddy painfully turned her neck to look at her. Victoire's lower lip quivered. "How could you be so caught up with your little world that you can't let me in? Am I that unimportant to you?" she asked.

"It's not that," Teddy said curtly. Victoire looked at him. Her puffy eyes pierced Teddy's heart like a dagger. He didn't know why he felt guilty seeing her cry. It was her fault that they never talked. She couldn't even decide what friendship is and she stood in front of him right at the moment and was crying. He didn't understand why he felt sorry. "Victoire…" All his life, Teddy felt sorry for himself. He felt sorry that he didn't have someone to love him. Then he realized why. He didn't let anybody love him. "I'm sorry."

"I don't understand," said Victoire. "I don't want to be with you because you're always gloomy about the world. You can't smile even when there's something happy going on. You can't even say sorry or thank you for things you've done, pranks you've done. You never learn your lessons even after detentions. You talk back to teachers." She looked into Teddy's eyes. "I can't understand why I can't stop thinking about you," she admitted.

Teddy felt his heart stop. He felt time freeze at the moment as he looked at Victoire. He didn't want life to go on. He wanted it to end right then and there where he heard something his heart had been longing to hear. Someone cared for him, someone was there for him. How could he have been too blind not to see it? What happened back then that he never understood? Teddy's mind raced for answers.

_"You can continue hating me if you want. If you can't even decide whether I'm your friend or not, then maybe I'm not." It hurt Teddy to say this. He looked at Victoire for a moment. She was as if frozen in her own thoughts. Teddy sadly shook his head and turned to walk away. As he did for the second time, he knew he was right this time._

Victoire wiped the tears off her eyes. "I tried to tell you I was very sorry that night, but you turned and walked away before I could. I could never understand why you had to walk away from me like that. Many times I tried to get your attention, but you never seem to listen to me. You were so cold. You still are so cold." Victoire shook her head. "Dad was right. People don't change…" she whispered. "I can't believe you could…"

Teddy placed a finger on her lips. "Aw, stop that talking, Vicky." Victoire looked up at him. Teddy softly ran his fingers through Victoire's hair. "I'm sorry if I acted coldly. I'm sorry if I never look at you. I'm sorry for everything that made you cry." Teddy wiped away the tears left on Victoire's face with his thumb. "When the two of us are together, let's throw that old Teddy Lupin away, shall we? You and me, we'll be open around each other. No more cold Teddy Lupin, I promise," he whispered.

Teddy lowered his head and pressed his lips against Victoire's. Victoire was surprised for a moment and didn't know what to do. She felt Teddy's exploring hers. After a few seconds, Victoire eased herself and pressed her lips against Teddy's lips as well. The moon shone brightly that night, the full moon.

**'Cause I'm not here**

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	9. Now You Know Me

**A/N: ****Thank you to the reviewers!**

**Hope you enjoy**

**please review **

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_**October **__**2013**_

Teddy looked at threw his head back. His hair turned green. "How's that?" he asked, looking at Victoire. Victoire smiled and nodded. Teddy placed an arm around her. "Come on now. I do love Hogsmeade weekends." Victoire smacked her lips. Teddy looked at her. "Don't tell me you placed lipstick on it again," he said. Victoire nodded. "Again?"

"A girl can't have _too_ much lipstick," said Victoire. Teddy shook her head and smiled. Victoire gave him a playful push. "Don't be such a spoil sport. I can't believe Mum allowed me to get this from the Muggle mall." She looked at Teddy with a grateful look. "Thanks for taking me there, Teddy," she said. "There can be no better boy that I could go out with."

Teddy felt his heart leap. Since that night after celebrating his prefect moment, he and Victoire constantly wrote to each other. Teddy had never felt so much comforted and happy before in his life. He couldn't believe that he wasted so many years trying to find something that had already been in front of him for the longest time. Teddy smiled at the thought of his nervousness when he wanted to ask Victoire out for the first time. Bill isn't too keen with the idea of him being with her, as far as he could remember. When they were younger, he had warned Victoire to keep out of his way.

_"Are you sure you're going to be okay, Teddy?" asked Victoire. She looked at Teddy uncertainly. Teddy nodded as he fixed his shirt. Victoire smiled at him. "Daddy won't eat you. Good luck. I'll be waiting in the kitchen," she said and rushed off to the other room. _

_Teddy watched her and sighed. She was the most beautiful thing he had ever laid his eyes on. "Fleur said you were looking for me," said Bill as he came down the stairs. Teddy took a deep breath. Bill looked at Teddy. "Aren't you looking very dashing today?" he said with a smile. He offered Teddy a seat. "What do you want to talk about?" he asked. _

_Teddy tried to fix his eyes at bill, though his chest was pounding like crazy as of the moment. "I…" Teddy felt butterflies fly all over is stomach. His mind urged him to search for the nearest window and jump and run away. Teddy mustered all the courage he could. "I was wondering if I could take Victoire out today," he said in on breath. _

_Bill leaned back on the couch. Teddy bit his lower lip. He knew that Bill didn't want his daughter to be near him. Teddy regretted his resentful ways. If only he was a bit friendlier when he was younger, then Bill would've said yes the very instant he asked. Teddy could feel his hear slowly sink, knowing that Bill wouldn't say yes to him. _

_"What time will you bring her home?" asked Bill, looking rather suspicious. __Teddy blinked. He tried to calm himself down. He was one step closer to having Bill say yes to him. "And where will you take her?" Bill added before Teddy could answer his first question._

_Teddy took a wild guess on what Bill might want to hear. "Eight would be the latest," he answered. "I was thinking of taking her to the Muggle mall Harry used to bring me. I thought Victoire would enjoy something Non-Magical since I think she's shopped at every magical store there is," he explained. He clasped his hands. He could feel them sweating. _

_A lot of thoughts ran through his brain. He thought about his parents. Would they have approved him of being with Victoire? Would they have asked her the same questions as Bill was asking him. Would they be against his plan and his feelings?_

_To Teddy's surprise, Bill smiled. "Seven-thirty and you can take her," he said. __Teddy's eyes shone when he heard this. His ears turned pink, and so did his hair. __Bill laughed as he stood up and shook Teddy's hand. "I know you'll__ take good care of my Victoire." He placed his free hand on Teddy's shoulder. "She's only thirteen, but she's old enough to decide for herself. I believe she's responsible, and so are you. You've changed a lot and I'm happy to say that you did," he said. _

As Teddy looked at Victoire, he knew he could be no more luckier than he is. Not only does he have a very beautiful girlfriend (on account that Victoire _is _half Veela), but he also has a very wonderful friend who he could trust his world to. He knew that Victoire would never betray his feelings and he knew he would never betray hers.

"You're looking spaced out again," said Victoire. Teddy snapped out of his thoughts and looked at Victoire. Victoire leaned closer to him. "Are we going to Uncle George's shop? Isn't it a good thing that he built a branch at Hogsmeade?" Teddy nodded as they walked through the halls. "I can't wait. Are we going to The Three Broomsticks?" she asked.

Teddy nodded. "If that's where you want us to go," he replied. He gazed into Victoire's eyes. "You really are truly beautiful, you know that?" Victoire giggled. Teddy stroked her flaming red hair. "You really look wonderful and I love you more than you look beautiful," he said.

Victoire stopped walking. Teddy had never said that he loved her before. "Teddy…" Teddy smiled at her. "You're really wonderful!" she exclaimed and threw her arms around him. Teddy laughed and hugged her back. "You're the best person I ever knew in this world, next to Mummy and Daddy. I love you too," she said, much to Teddy's surprise as well as hers when she said it.

They did go to the Three Broomsticks at Hogsmeade. Teddy got butterbeer for the both of them. "Hey Teddy," said Victoire as she sat on the seat across Teddy. Teddy looked at her. He changed his hair to yellow. He got used to morphsizing after a while of practicing, mostly because of Victoire's encouragement. "You're really the best person I know."

"How's that?" asked Teddy as he pushed the butterbeer towards her. He leaned back on the chair and studied Victoire's face. He couldn't take his eyes off of her ever since that night of their first kiss, which they kept a secret from everyone.

**And you see the things they never see**

Victoire didn't think twice as she said, "You're funny, smart, and thoughtful." She took a sip of her butterbeer. Her eyes shifted from the table to Teddy. "You're always there for me when I need you and you're always there to cheer me up if I feel down. You love me like my Mum and Dad does, which means you love me very much, and I know it." Teddy smiled. "You're very determined and helpful. You're also calm and collected, even when other people are bashing at you."

Teddy laughed on the inside. He was never really calm and collected in his thoughts. He was rather confused, scared, and angry every time someone badmouthed him. He couldn't understand himself many times and he always felt angry and upset for no reason at all. He was glad that all of it had finally quieted down a bit. Victoire calmed the storms that happened inside of him. She had brought out the best in him, so to say.

"Teddy," Victoire piped up. Teddy raised an eyebrow and casually held her hand that was on the table. Victoire turned her hand and help Teddy's. They looked at each others' eyes. "I know it's the wrong time and place to ask this, but I was wondering…" Teddy nodded for her to continue. "What is it like to have no parents?" she asked quietly.

Teddy thought for a moment. "Scary," he replied. "It's scary and confusing. A lot of times I wanted to run away and hide, but there was no place for that for me. I don't have anyone to run away to and I don't have any place to hide. Besides, I'm a werewolf's son. If I do that, they'd tease me even more. I know it's a drag, but I've got to live with it. It's my life." Victoire looked at him thoughtfully. "I guess Mum and Dad wouldn't want me to run away from my problems either. So I did what I thought I could do best. Keep away from everyone. Build those walls that you just destroyed."

Victoire laughed a bit. "With a chisel and a hammer?" she asked. Teddy smiled at her. Victoire leaned towards the table. "I guess I never understood you before because I never put myself in your place. It must be hard to live without parents. I can't imagine living my life without Mum and Dad," she said in a dreamy voice.

"You don't have to," said Teddy. Victoire nodded. The two of them stood up as they held hands. "Let's go walk to George's shop. Maybe we could find something interesting there. I can't do big pranks but I'm sure Hogwarts wouldn't deprive me of doing them in a minimal rate," he told Victoire with an impish wink. Victoire giggled.

That night, Victoire and Teddy went to their special place, the Owelry Teddy casually leaned on the wall in a squatted position as Victoire looked out the window to gaze at the stars. Teddy taught her to love the things he loved. He showed her the friends she had eventually come to like too. Teddy was happy that she could appreciate what he appreciated.

Teddy tapped the new game he bought from Hogsmeade with his wand. "Open," he murmured, but nothing happed. Victoire turned to look at him. Teddy sighed. "This is a tough puzzle. It's the only thing I've never gotten to solve, aside from my feelings, that is," he said. Victoire smiled at him. Teddy smiled back. "Something tells me that you want something," he said.

Victoire dropped to her knees and leaned forward. Her lips touched Teddy's. Teddy felt his heart thump hard. He dropped the locket and wrapped his arms around Victoire. He pulled her closer to him as he kissed her passionately.

Teddy slowly broke off the kiss. "We shouldn't be doing this at this hour," he whispered. Victoire smiled and stood up. Teddy stood up too. "Bill would kill me if he found out we had been doing this all the time we're here," he said. Victoire just shrugged. Teddy placed his arm around her waist as they walked back down and headed for the Gryffindor tower. "Time for you to go to sleep and for me to do some rounds," he muttered.

Victoire giggled. "Daddy was right," she said. "Given a little responsibility, you changed." Her eyes sparkled before Teddy. "I'm happy that you've finally shown me the Teddy Lupin I was hoping to see for a long time," she said. Teddy nodded. Victoire gave him a hug before walking back to her dorm. Teddy watched as she went.

**All you wanted, I could be**

Teddy thought about what Victoire had said. He didn't know that Bill counted on him changing. He stopped walking for a moment and realized that it was true. He had changed. His mood swings lessened. His bitterness and anger went away. Even if he thought about his parents, he never thought of them leaving him now.

The young prefect walked down the hall. He saw a twelve-year-old Hufflepuff slip down the hall. Being the one who used to do so before, he knew there the boy was heading. Teddy walked quickly to the end of the next hall and met the wide-eyed Hufflepuff.

"But you were-were-" He turned and looked at the other end of the hall where Teddy was when he must've spotted him. Teddy gave him a twisted smile. The Hufflepuff boy hung his head. "Don't take away points from me," he begged. "Mum's going to murder me if she finds out that I've been sneaking around. I won't be going around again if you don't turn me in," he promised.

Teddy looked at the boy's eyes. "Hogwash, my friend," he said. He had known those eyes before. That look belonged to him when he said those words. "I've been there and done that. Takes more than that to persuade me, you know." Teddy could tell that the Hufflepuff boy was getting intimidated now. "Let's see now. How many points should I deduct…?"

"Please don't!" pleaded the boy. "Honestly. I've never gotten detention from last year. Mum's going to kill me if I start getting them. Please Ted Lupin!" His eyes met with Teddy. Teddy, being used to being stared at, stayed cold and unpredictable. "Please!"

Teddy rolled his eyes. "Come with me," he said. The Hufflepuff boy walked alongside Teddy with his head lowered. Teddy walked him to the other end of the hall. He pointed towards the Hufflepuff dormitory. "Take that hall and go down the left. Ravenclaw prefects always take the right one. Stay clear of it." Surprised, the boy turned to Teddy with grateful eyes. Teddy smiled at him. "Like I said, been there done that."

"Don't think I didn't see that." Teddy spun and saw Professor Longbottom looking at him. Teddy's color drained out of his face. Professor Longbottom shook his head. "You did change," he said quietly. "Harry told me. He wrote to me before Hogwarts started. I couldn't believe it until I saw it with my own eyes. You could've done anything to that Hufflepuff boy," he said.

Teddy shrugged. "It's going to be tough when his mother kills him." He found himself laughing the next second. "I guess I should call myself lucky that my Mum isn't around to kill me after all the detentions I've gotten the last four years." He looked at Professor Longbottom. "Why are you looking at me like that?" he asked.

Professor Longbottom shook his head. "Never thought I would see the day that you will talk about your parents as freely as tonight without anger," he said. Teddy cocked his head. If Professor Longbottom hadn't pointed that out, he wouldn't have noticed. Professor Longbottom fixed his robes. "Just as we had expected from you, Ted. You do handle responsibility well balancing power and heart. I finally see Professor Lupin in you."

"Finally?" said Teddy. Professor Longbottom nodded. Teddy smiled. "I see." He looked at his watch. "I guess it's times for me to head to Gryffindor tower too. Thanks for what you said, Professor Longbottom," he said and walked off.

Teddy could hold his head up high now. He could proudly say that he'd changed from before. This is reality to him now, not his old ways. Teddy walked to his bed slowly so not to wake his other roommates. He dragged his trunk out from underneath the bed. He rummaged through his things and finally found it, a stuffed wolf that he had set aside for so long, though he still brought it along with him from time to time. Luckily, he brought it this year.

"Dad," he whispered, "I hope you can really say that you're proud of me now." In the darkness, he hugged the stuffed wolf. Teddy did not realize it, but as he did, his parents hugged him the same way too. They might not be with him physically, but they were there with him. In his mind, and more importantly, in his heart.

**Now you know me, and I'm not afraid**

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	10. Who I Am

**A/N**: **This is an important author's note. I am not the author of this story. The author who has been writing this story is very sick at the moment and I'm afraid will not be coming out from the hospital for a couple of months or so. Oh, and by the way, this is her cousin. There are some good news and bad news for you. Let's start with the bad news first. **

**Bad news is: I am not the author of this story and I am in no power in altering the chapters. I am bad at writing for one, and I guess I will ruin her lot if I do. ****So there.**

**There is no more ****sequel**** to this story after this finishes unless she gets out of the hospital and start writing again.**

**Good news is: I am privileged to be the one to upload all her files thrice a week or twice if I am busy for the week (requested by her)**

**She has already finished writing this story before she entered the hospital, thus this story is actually completed. (She said she didn't want to leave it undone, so there you are.)**

**I will be editing the author's notes because she will be responding to your reviews because she requested me to print out your reviews (and please do) and show it to her. This means that she will see your reviews. I will post her replies and responses here if you don't mind. **

**My cousin knew that she was about to enter the hospital before writing this and she said this is her second last story for fan fiction (But They Were Happy and Love Takes You In are also works in progress that I haven't updated yet.) I remember she was up many nights trying to finish this and she really worked hard on this piece. She liked and she enjoyed it with you guys very much. She says to say thank you to all the reviewers and the ones who put this on their favorites and alerts. She said she's really sorry, but this will be her last story until she gets out of the hospital.**

**Author waves hi to everyone and says that she hopes you enjoy the rest of the story. **

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_**December 2013**_

"Welcome home, Teddy," greeted Andromeda as she met her grandson home from school. She embraced him and kissed him on the cheek. She held his arms and looked at him beaming. "You didn't get into detention this term," she reminded him. Teddy nodded. Andromeda gave him another tight embrace. "I'm so proud of you, Teddy."

Teddy laughed and threw his head back. "Thanks, Grammy." As Andromeda let go, he walked to the fireplace to get warm. He looked at the photo of his parents that hung on the wall. "Grammy, they would be proud of me too, wouldn't they?" he said. Andromeda nodded, though she was very much surprised at Teddy. He never talked about his parents being proud of him before. Teddy sat on the couch. "Happy Christmas, Grammy."

Andromeda sat down beside him. "Happy Christmas, Teddy." Her eyes lay upon the grandson who had now changed a lot. His face wasn't the same either. He had a soft smile he never had before. Andromeda's eyes shone as she saw the change. "Your parents, I see them in you now," she whispered. She ran her now quite frail fingers through Teddy's hair. "Your mother and your father, I see them live in you." She couldn't take her eyes off of him.

Instead of Andromeda and Teddy going over to the Potters to celebrate Christmas, the Potters went to their place this time. Quite frankly, Andromeda missed the laughter and giggles of a child so she was excited to hear that the Potter kids would be coming to visit them. She made the best food she could and visited herself happily in the kitchen while Teddy set the table.

A knock came to the door. Teddy went to answer it. Harry and his family came into the house with smiles and gifts. Teddy greeted the couple a Happy Christmas. He also greeted the children too who seemed very hyperactive as of the moment. Albus chased James into the house the moment Teddy opened the door. Lily danced towards them, also joining their fun.

"Happy Christmas, Teddy," said Ginny and gave him a hug. Teddy smiled. Ginny looked at Teddy. "You are so tall. I wonder where you get the height from." She and Harry entered the room. Ginny gave her children a stern look. "If I hear one more noise from any one of you, it's straight back to Godric's Hollow," she threatened.

Teddy looked at James sympathetically. He contorted his face at the thought of going home. "It's Christmas, let them be," said Teddy. James jumped for joy and ran for Teddy. Teddy caught him and hoisted him up. He quickly ser him back down since James was getting a little too heavy to carry. "Happy Christmas to you too, James."

Harry tilted his head. "What's gotten into you?" he asked Teddy. Teddy looked at Harry and raised an eyebrow. Harry ruffled Albus as the little boy passed by, still chasing his older brother around the living room. "Neville's told me you've been staying out of trouble since the start of the term." He jerked his head towards the back door. "Mind if we talk outside?" he asked.

**And I wanna tell you who I am**

"Nope," replied Teddy as he and Harry walked to the backyard. Teddy looked up at the full moon. "It wouldn't be a fun Christmas right now for Dad, would it?" Harry shook his head. Teddy slowly smiled. "I hope he's having a fun Christmas right now, wherever he is," he said.

He knew that he never talked about his parents. He knew that he never wished anything upon his father. This was a shock, even to Teddy himself, but he felt happy saying it. All his bitterness hid somewhere he couldn't find for he couldn't find a reason to be bitter against his parents anymore. Maybe age did get the better of him and cleared his mind. Maybe lowering his pride and looking at Victoire did. Some mysteries could never be solved, or so Teddy thought.

"He is," said Harry. He looked at Teddy. "He is happy. He received the best gift Christmas gift this year, I believe." Teddy looked at Harry uncertainly. Harry chuckled. "You," he said simply. Teddy looked puzzled. "They're finally seeing the real Teddy Lupin. Well, I'm finally seeing the real Teddy Lupin. The Teddy that we've all been waiting for. It's been fifteen years." Teddy dug his hand into his pocket. "I bet Remus and Tonks are happier than you can imagine," said Harry.

Teddy relaxed his face. "A lot of times I wish my parents were here during Christmas," he admitted. He closed his eyes and felt the cool wind. "They'd come pick me up and we'll celebrate Christmas together. We'd talk about my term. We'd have cocoa to keep us warm. We'll huddle together and keep each other warm." Teddy opened his eyes. "Ill tell them how happy I am to have them, how lucky I am to have them," he said.

"You are," said Harry. "What else is on your mind?"

"You can tell?" said Teddy. Harry nodded. Teddy smiled. "I'll tell my dad that I'm not ashamed of being his son even though he's a werewolf. I'll even tell him how proud I am for overcoming his fears. How grateful I am that he married Mum and had me." He looked at Harry. "I won't be ashamed of the home I belong to," he said. "But sometimes I feel like a coward. Like a little boy."

**Can you help me be a man?**

Harry shook his head. "That's nothing to be afraid of," he assured Teddy. "Even I get scared sometimes. We all do. Fear is not something we lose in a blink of an eye and I can assure you that it's perfectly fine to feel scared. I'm just glad you're man enough to admit that you have fears in you. Guess what Teddy? You're finally normal."

Teddy laughed. "Finally huh? People keep on saying that word over and over again that it's been ringing in my ear all term." He heard his grandmother call from the house. Teddy looked at Harry. "It's time for dinner. Grammy makes the best Christmas meals. Hope you'll like it," he said, for it was the first time the Potters celebrated with them.

"That's mine!" whined Albus as he tried to grab his gift from James. James, being much taller than Albus, held the gift up high so his brother would be unable to reach it. Albus turned to his mother. "Mum, James is at it again," he said, pointing at his older brother who stuck his tongue out at Albus. "Mum, James stuck his tongue out on me!"

Ginny sighed. "Stop it, you two," she said exasperatedly. She flashed a look at James. "You, sit!" she barked. James dropped the gift and scrambled to his chair. Albus grabbed the gift and went to his seat as well; Ginny looked at the both of them. "Eat your vegetables or there _will _be veggies for a week every single day whether you both like it or not," she threatened. Both boys began stuffing all the vegetables to their mouths.

Teddy laughed. "You'll choke if you go on like that," he warned. James shrugged as he gobbled up his food. Teddy looked at Ginny. "Aren't they going to choke?" Ginny shook her head. Knowing the boys, if they were to choke on something, it would never be vegetables. Teddy tilted his head and popped the piece of meatball into his mouth and chewed.

After dinner, Teddy helped his grandmother do the dishes while the Potters warmed themselves by the fire. Teddy did it the Muggle way, which he preferred doing rather than magic. For some reason, he liked to get his hands wet by the running water. It reminds him of the first time he and his grandmother talked about his parents.

_"Teddy," said Andromeda. The three-yearold popped his head into the kitchen. __"Come in here," said Andromeda softly. Teddy walked up to her carrying his favorite toy, the stuffed wolf. __Andromeda levitated one of the chairs and placed in near the sink. "You're old enough to help me out," she said. "Step up and wash the dishes."_

_Teddy blinked. He had never done the dishes with his grandmother before. __Andromeda walked to him and held his hands with hers. She helped him pick up a plate slowly. Teddy opened the faucet. __Andromeda showed him how to scrub the plates the Muggle way. _

_"Your mother loves doing this," she whispered to the toddler. __Teddy stopped. The tap water flowed as Teddy touched the plates. He felt the cool water reach his hand. "She was very helpful when she was about your age. You do want to be like your grandmother, don't you?" she said. Teddy nodded. He had never heard Andromeda speak of his parents before. "From now on, I'll tell you more stories about your parents."_

"Teddy." Teddy looked up. His grandmother was looking at him. "The water's not going to stop flowing until you turn the faucet off. The plates are shinier than ever. You've scrubbed them all twice now and I think they'll break if you scrub even more." Teddy looked at Andromeda's twisted smile. She could pull a joke every now and then. "Now off with you. Go to Harry. I'll finish up," she said.

Teddy nodded and walked toward the living room. James tackled him to the ground before he even got near to the couch. Teddy laughed as he tried to get James off of him, but the boy was getting bigger and stronger by the minute. Teddy finally managed to get James off of him by tickling the eight-year-old into letting go.

"Time to open the gifts!" Albus exclaimed excitedly as he sat nearest to the Christmas Tree. He couldn't help but glance at the biggest package once in a while. He found his name clearly written on the tag and couldn't wait to open it. He looked at his parents willfully. "Please can I get to open the first gift first?" he pleaded.

Ginny shook her head. "Rules are rules," she reminded him. She turned to Lily. "The last one will be the first." Lily stuck her tongue out at Albus who scowled. Ginny looked at Lily sternly. "I saw that. One more move like that and you aren't going to open any gifts at all," she warned. Lily curled her lips and went silently to the Christmas Tree to open a gift.

Harry placed his arm around Ginny. "It's Christmas. Don't be so hotheaded," he said calmly. Ginny leaned back on the couch. Harry looked at Teddy. "I think you'll enjoy what Ginny and I decide to give to you," he said. Teddy squatted on the carpet next to James who looked enviously at Lily who intentionally slowly unwrap her gift. Harry looked at her. "If it takes you more than ten seconds to unwrap it then you should be last," he said.

"Now who's getting hotheaded?" said Ginny. Harry sighed and shook his head. Ginny stroked his hair. "It isn't easy being parents, is it?" Harry shook his head again. Ginny giggled. "I bet you'd rather be out there battling Voldemort again than facing another day babysitting this three," she whispered, but Teddy must've heard it because he slightly frowned.

**They can't break me**

Although Teddy had gotten over his bitterness of his parents, for some reason, he cannot seem to get over the fact that they were gone. It was that battle that took their lives. He couldn't let go of his wishful thinking that his parents would one day come through the door and tell him that it was all an act and they had to come home.

Harry looked at Teddy thoughtfully. "Guess what?" he said. Teddy looked up as he dismissed his thoughts. "I think you're going to like our present this year. We meant to give it to you last year, but I think this year would be a lot better." She looked at Lily who had just finished unwrapping her gifts. Ron and Hermione bought her a doll. Harry looked at Albus. "It's your turn," he said.

Albus lunged at the biggest package there was. Andromeda joined them. She sat on the armchair opposite Harry and Ginny Potter. She watched as Albus excitedly tore the gift wrapping into shreds. His eyes widened as he stared at the big box before him.

"A big ball?" Albus's voice sounded very disappointed when he saw a big ball in front of him. That was all. He looked at the tag. "Practical. I bet it was Aunt Hermione's turn to buy the gifts this year. They got Lily a doll and I doubt Uncle Ron would buy anything like that." He looked at James. "Go on, open their present. I bet you're going to get a broom," he said.

James crawled towards the tree. He took Ron and Hermione's present. He slowly tore it open it wasn't as Albus predicted it. "It is a book," said James. Albus laughed. James read the title. "Hold on, at least it's useful." He stood up and gave the book to his parents. "Aren't they awesome? They really know what to get me," he said happily, causing Albus to grow envious of him.

Ginny smiled. "How To Play Quidditch The Right Way," she read. She looked at James who was looking very delighted. "You look happy." James nodded vigorously. He danced around the living room with the book. Ginny laughed a bit. She looked at Teddy. "It's your turn now," she said. "Mind you, you might want to open ours first. I think I'm more excited to see you see it than you are." Harry snorted. Ginny slapped him lightly. "Harry," she scolded.

Teddy smiled and took the gift from under the tree. "A book?" he asked. Harry shrugged. He tore it open. Teddy's eyes widened. "Harry, how did you…?" he asked, but his voice trailed off. Harry and Ginny looked at each other with amusement. Teddy looked at them gratefully. "I can't…I…this…" he couldn't find the right words.

"It's yours. We found it when you were three years old and we decided to give it to you when we think you're ready," Harry explained. Teddy stood up. Without warning, he threw his arms around his godfather. "This is the best gift ever, Harry. Thank you very much!"

Harry hugged him back. "I'm glad you like it," he said. Teddy stood straight again. His eyes dazzled as Teddy stared at his gift. Harry looked at the crackling fire. "I've never seen what's inside it. I meant it for you. I promise that I haven't even opened it." Teddy nodded, but he hadn't taken his eyes off Harry's gift. Harry chuckled. "Happy Christmas, Ted."

After the Potters left, Teddy went up to his room. He sat on his bed and stared at Harry's gift. On the cover was scribbled, clearly and very wonderfully to Teddy: REMUS JOHN LUPIN. Below it was a small paper, apparently permanently taped to the notebook: JOURNAL. Teddy took a deep breath before opening it.

"Here it goes," he whispered excitedly. He slowly opened the notebook. Before even reading the first place, a picture fell out of the notebook. Teddy picked it up. It was another picture of the three of them, but this time he was awake, unlike the picture he had on his bedside table. Teddy turned the picture and saw a messy scribbling behind it. He smiled as he read it.

To Teddy Lupin: I believe that I'm gone as you read this, but I hope you know that I love you and your mother more than anything else in the world. I'm sorry that I will never get to see you grow up, be the man you want to be. I will miss all that and I'm sorry if I cause you pain. I'm sorry if people tease you because of being a werewolf's son, which I know they would, but please keep your head up high. I will always love you, no matter who you are or what you will become. I love you, Teddy Lupin.

Love, Dad

**As long as I know who I am**

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	11. I Belong

**A/N: ****(Author's exact words: ) Thank you to the reviewers. I can't believe I got that many reviews for the last chapter. I hope you enjoy this too. Please review afterwards. Thanks. **

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_**February**__** 2015**_

"Happy birthday," said Teddy as he handed Victoire a small package. Victoire looked at him with a smile. Teddy smiled back. "Open it. I think you'll like it," he said. Victoire slowly tore open the wrapping. Her eyes widened when she saw the content. She looked at him, apparently shocked. "Oh don't worry. I didn't steal the money," he joked.

"But…" Victoire started as she stared at the shimmering gold necklace. "This must cost Galleons. I've seen these things." Teddy gently took the necklace from her. Victoire lifted her hair as Teddy placed the necklace around her neck. "Teddy, you shouldn't have. This…" She spun and looked at him when he had done snapping the lock together. She was plainly speechless. "Teddy, all your money…your savings…they…"

**And I want a moment to be real**

Teddy wrapped her arms around him. "They're just coins, Vicky. You, you're very precious to me," he whispered to her ear. "Besides, I've been saving them for a special occasion. This is a special occasion, isn't it?" he said. Victoire leaned on him. She closed her eyes. "Happy birthday, Victoire," said Teddy softly as he kissed her cheek.

Teddy had never loved someone like this before. He had never even cared for someone so much. The money he used to buy the golden necklace was the money he worked for in the last two years when he babysat for the Potter kids or the Weasley kids if they needed it. He never thought he'd spend it not for himself. But it didn't matter to Teddy at the moment how or where he spent it. Victoire was special to him. It felt right to do it.

"Ted Lupin, don't you have somewhere to go?" Teddy looked up and saw Professor McGonagall, the Headmistress. Teddy let go of Victoire. Professor McGonagall looked at the pair. Teddy could've been imagining it, but he saw her eyes glisten. "The prefect meetings will be three this afternoon. Besides, I believe you have Quidditch practice, Lupin," she said.

Teddy nodded. "Yes, Professor." Professor McGonagall nodded curtly walked away. Teddy looked at Victoire. "I'm sorry." He did look sorry. He had promised Victoire that he would spend the whole day with her during her birthday. He didn't know that there were a lot of meeting and practices scheduled that day since he rarely checked the calendar for activities that prefects and Quidditch players were entitled to have. Having a lot of responsibility felt _hard_.

Victoire smiled at him. "Oh don't worry," she said. She gave Teddy a hug. "I'll see you later tonight. Don't tire yourself out. What time is your practice for Quidditch then?" she asked Teddy held up four fingers. "I'll see you then. I can't wait to see you take home the Quidditch Cup again. Beat the lights out of the Seeker." Victoire winked.

Teddy walked down the hallway thinking about Victoire. He could have never imagined this kind of life before that night when he was made prefect. He never knew that opening up his world to another person would bring him more joy and happiness. He had never expected this to happen to him when he was bitter at the world. Teddy made his way to his dormitory. He looked at the picture that he pinned to the side of the wall so that it'd be the first thing he'd see in the morning.

"Today's a great day, Mum, Dad," he whispered as he looked at the picture. His parents waved at him. Teddy laughed. "I guess you're happy for me too, huh?" He sat on the bed as he gathered his papers for the prefect meeting. "Dad, I don't know how you dated a girl back then with all these meetings," he grumbled as he grabbed his Quidditch gear as well. "But I'm glad that you met Mum."

Teddy managed to gather all his things on time. He rushed down and out of the Gryffindor tower to go to the meeting. Teddy thought of his parents. Would they have been really proud of him right now? He smiled. He knew they would. Everybody told him they would, and those everybody had been with his parents longer than he had. That meant they knew more about him than he did. It's time to put trust on those people. They wouldn't lie to him.

As he walked down the hall, he met their Quidditch Captain. "Lupin!" Teddy almost jumped upon hearing his name. "Don't forget practice. I'll kill you if you miss it today. I know you're good, but it's not time to get cocky." Teddy nodded. The captain gave him a thump on the back. "It's been nice, you being in the team. I hope to see you even after Hogwarts."

"You too," replied Teddy. He looked at his watch. "Damn, I have to go. I'll see you later at practice." Teddy tiredly dropped his things. "Why can't I use something more sensible?" he muttered. "Wingardium Leviosa." He walked off as his things levitated behind him.

"But all those first years wouldn't even know!" snapped the Head Boy. He looked up and saw Teddy enter the room with a bunch of papers levitating behind them. "For once you're on time," he said exasperatedly. He grabbed the levitating papers and studied them. "I thought these wouldn't be done until next week?" He looked at Teddy who grinned. "I could kiss you!" He turned to the rest of the prefects. "The Gryffindor papers are done," he announced.

The Ravenclaw prefect stood up. "What? You weren't supposed to do that, Lupin!" she said. "Those aren't due until next week! What if the statistics change by then?" She glared at him. For the past two years, everyone knew that the Ravenclaw prefects envied Teddy. "Werewolves! So irresponsible!" she muttered.

Teddy calmly smiled. "Oh don't worry about that," he replied. "It's mean to update on its own once the statistics change and I don't think seven days would be too much of a big change for that little Charm. Very handy." Teddy looked sideways at the Ravenclaw prefect. He knew that he had finally gotten the better of her. His eyes gazed back to the Head Boy. "I've got Quidditch practice at four," he said apologetically.

"See?" piped up the Ravenclaw prefect. "He's trying to escape out meeting again! He thinks Quidditch is a lot more important than being a prefect. He shouldn't have been made a prefect," she said grudgingly. "Never trust a werewolf."

Teddy's patience thinned. "Oh but on the contrary, I am not a werewolf even though _I am_ a werewolf's son. My dad wasn't born a werewolf, but was just bitten and become one. It wouldn't affect me," he said coolly. "If you pay more attention in class, I believe you would have learned this by now." He turned back to the Head Boy. "Who's the animal now?" he asked a low voice that made the Head Boy look stern, but Teddy knew he was suppressing his laughter at Teddy's comment.

The fifth year Gryffindor prefect looked at Teddy. "What about the list of students?" he asked. Teddy turned to look at him. "Okay, that's supposed to be my job but I'm not as good as you are." Teddy raised an eyebrow. The fifth year prefect sat on the chair. "Fine…I'll make the list tonight," he said in an exasperated tone.

The meeting soon began. The Head Girl entered the room. She looked at all the prefects and nodded. The Head Boy began their discussion. Teddy leaned back on his chair and pretended to listen, though his mind actually thought of either Victoire or Quidditch at the moment. He couldn't wait to be out in the field flying on his broom again.

"Lupin!" Teddy slowly looked up. The Head Boy pointed at his watch. "I thought you said you had practice at four?" he asked. Teddy sprang from his chair. He grabbed his Quidditch gear and ran out of the door without another word. Whispers went throughout the room. "Silence now," said the Head Boy. "Back to what we were discussing." He looked at the Head Girl and with a low voice said, "He wasn't listening to us, was he?" The Head Girl smiled and shook her head.

**Wanna touch things I don't feel**

Teddy mounted his broom, the Firebolt series. Harry had given it to him when he won a spot as a Bludger in the team. He kicked off from the ground and dashed seventy feet into the air. He looked out the sky above him and smiled. Somewhere out there, he could feel his parents were watching him. Somewhere out there…

"You're," the captain looked at his watch, "two and a half minutes late." Teddy grinned impishly. The captain shook his head. "Still the same Ted we know." He swooped down and yelled. "Okay! He's here. Round up. We're going to start with the Chasers. Not you, Lillian. I told you. Grace goes in first before you do," he said and flew to them to give the girls a long lecture about flying according to his instructions.

Teddy looked about. He felt the little breeze pass him by. He looked up at sky and imagined his parents' face outlined in the clouds. He smiled and flew higher. He reached out for the clouds. He felt saddened for a moment that he'd never know what his parents really felt about his achievements lately, but he felt happy that he could now see them the way he never saw them before.

"Look out!" Teddy turned and saw the Bludger headed towards him. With the bat on his hand, he hit it hard, sending it back down. For a moment, he thought he'd fall out of his broom. He looked at the clouds for the last time before lowering himself. The captain looked at him. "You could've broken your neck if you feel from the height," he pointed out. Teddy just grinned. The captain shook his head. "Be careful. Don't space out. Victoire Weasley shrieked, that's how I noticed."

Teddy slapped his forehead. He had forgotten that Victoire said she'd be watching him practice. He spotted his girlfriend on the ground. He flew down and landed perfectly. Victoire looked pale and frozen when he met her. He knew it was the aftermath of seeing him almost hit by the Bludger. Teddy dropped his bat o the ground. He wrapped his arms around Victoire to calm her down.

"You idiot!" Victoire said. Teddy just held her tighter. Victoire eased as she felt the warmth of Teddy's body. "You could've gotten yourself killed, you know." Teddy smiled at her and slowly let go. Victoire looked at Teddy. "Oh you are really an idiot." Teddy looked at her apologetically. She finally smiled back at him. "I'll be waiting for you by the benches. Try not to space out," she said in a very concerned voice.

"I promise," said Teddy. He grabbed his bat and mounted his broom again. "Don't worry about me, Vicky!" He kicked off high enough to hit the Bludger once more. Teddy sped around the Quidditch filed as they practiced. Soon, it got too dark to spot the balls so the rest of the team stopped practice. Teddy tackled the Bludger to the ground. "Bloody things," Teddy muttered as he snapped the Bludger lock into its casing.

"Oh they are very bloody," said the captain from behind him. Victoire walked up to them. "Don't ever space out in the game like that. The Bludger takes no mercy." Teddy nodded understandingly. The captain turned to Victoire. "Oh and by the way, I think you ought to try for the team some time. You've got great Quidditch blood in you. Charlie Weasley is an uncle of your right?" Victoire nodded. "He was a great Seeker."

Victoire laughed. "I still prefer watching than actually playing," she admitted. The captain nodded thoughtfully. Victoire turned to Teddy. "You were great," she said encouragingly. Teddy had found a home in Victoire's smile. She always smiled for him every time he finished something tiring. "Let's go to the Common Room," she suggested.

Teddy followed her to the Common Room. Since it was also nearing Valentines Day, everyone talked about Hogsmeade and dates. Victoire and Teddy didn't have to talk about it anymore. They looked at each other and smiled. Teddy sat on the couch. Victoire sat herself beside her. The both of them stared at the crackling fire on the hearth. Teddy felt warm not only in the outside, but also in the inside, where it all matters the most.

"Hey Victoire," someone said. Victoire turned and saw one of the mean Gryffindor girls. "Oh I guess you've gotten the hang of taming a werewolf. Look how collected he is recently." She looked disgustedly at Teddy's direction. "They should have never let you into Hogwarts. My father said that werewolves are outcasts." Victoire turned to snap at the girl, but Teddy held her back and shook his head. "Oh, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe you've turned into a vicious werewolf yourself, Victoire."

Teddy felt impatient. "The only vicious _thing_ I see is someone standing in red clothes and jeans. A mismatch if you ask me." The girl, suddenly conscious of her clothing, looked at the mirror nearby. "Yes, they don't even know how to wear their hair right. Shaggy things, those vicious creatures. I pity them for not knowing how to wear make up."

"If you weren't a prefect, Teddy Lupin, I would've hexed you," said the girl angrily. She fixed her hair on account that Teddy might have been right about it.

Teddy turned to look at her. "It wouldn't stop me if I were you. I hexed a prefect once or twice," he pointed out. The looked at Teddy unbelievingly. "If you don't believe me, ask some of the professors. You don't know me. You haven't seen me." Teddy drew out his wand and pointed it at her, but he was still seated on the couch. "So you want to challenge me?" he asked.

The girl held her head high and walked off. Teddy laughed and sat back on the couch. He placed his arm around Victoire as the rest of the people that were in the Common Room stared at them. Everyone knew not to mess with Teddy Lupin. Even though he seemed to be a lot more calm and collected now, no one could tell when he might end up hexing his offenders.

**Wanna hold on and feel I belong**

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	12. I'm Still Here

**A/N: ****Thank you to the reviewers. Please review.  
**

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_**June 2015**_

"And there goes the Bludger! What a smack by Ted Lupin!" said the commenter as Teddy whacked the Bludger towards the Slytherin Chaser. "This is a close one. Wait! The Bludger is coming back. That confounded Bludger doesn't know who he's aiming at. With one swing, the Gryffindor Beater would hit it anyway and Gryffindor will win the g-"

"JORDAN!" Professor McGonagall barked. Second year Brad Jordan turned. "Like father like son. If you go overboard with commentary one more time it's high time you don't comment at all." She leaned back on the seat, secretly hoping herself that Brad Jordan was right.

Teddy looked about for the Bludger. He saw it coming towards their Chaser. He swooped down and hit it right at the Slytherin Keeper. Teddy clicked his tongue when he missed. He seldom did. He figured maybe it was because he wasn't as angry as he was before so he couldn't put his anger in the game now. He looked around for more opportunities to knock the opposite team's players down. He might not be as accurate as before, but he was having fun like he never had when he was playing Quidditch.

**And how can the world want me to change**

"He's caught the Snitch! Slytherin team wins this match!" Brad Jordan evidently sounded disappointed. Teddy turned and sighed. He lowered himself to the ground. He could tell that the team captain was the most disappointed of all. It would be his last chance to win the Cup and they didn't even come close to winning it. Teddy dismounted his broom and went into Gryffindor's changing room.

The team captain sat on the chair and sulked. "Damn it," he said. He looked up. Everyone seemed to be looking tired. He looked at the team. "We did great. It's what all that counts," he said halfheartedly. Teddy felt sorry for him. He so much wanted the Quidditch Cup. The team captain looked at Teddy and smiled faintly. "It's a good thing you didn't space out in this match," he said.

Teddy nodded. "I guess." He dropped his bat. "It was a good match though." The team captain nodded. Teddy wracked his brain for more comforting words to say. "How about next year?" he asked, which was a dumb statement since the team captain would have graduated by then. The team captain snorted. Teddy pursed his lips.

Everyone wasn't very happy when the team gathered in the Common Room. Some shook their heads. This made the team captain even feel worse than he did back in the changing room. He plopped down on the couch and stared aimlessly at the wall in front of him. The other members of the team went to their rooms, maybe to sulk.

Teddy didn't want to be depressed since he didn't feel too bad about losing. He couldn't care less. He had fun doing it and that was all that mattered to him. He walked out of the Common Room. As he strolled down the hallway, he came across seventh year Slytherins.

"Aw, look Keenan, out little were-pup is looking upset," teased one of them. The other one sneered. "Poor Teddy Lupin. His father must be out there _somewhere_ trying to _hug_ his baby boy." The other boys laughed at this. Teddy tried to walk off, but the Slytherin boy grabbed his shoulder. "Are you angry now that I've said your parents are _dead_, were-pup?" he asked.

Teddy whipped out his wand and pointed it at the Slytherin boy. "You shut up about my Dad!" he yelled. He felt his heart pump hard. For some reason, he wasn't able to hold his temper this time. "Get out of my face, you arse!"

The Slytherins also drew out their wands and pointed it back at Teddy. "You want to duel?" one of them asked coolly. "Then so be it. But look at the situation, Lupin. There are four of us and one of you." He sneered. "Who would want to be a were-pup's second? Poor little creature, you are, aren't you? Your dead parents can't save you," he hissed.

**They're the ones that stay the same**

Teddy muttered, "Stupefy!" It hit the Slytherin right at the chest. He managed to dodge to spells aimed at him. Teddy knew that being outnumbered wasn't a good thing. He turned to run for it. He wasn't being a coward at all. They were. Four against one isn't a very brave act. Teddy managed to slip through the other side of the hall without being seen. He knew the castle by heart for he had slipped himself through every hole he could find when he was younger.

"Over here," Teddy could hear one of the Slytherin boys say. He snickered and briskly walked back up to the Gryffindor tower. He would have a lot more peace there. The Slytherins would tire looking for him soon once they realize that he could no longer be found.

"There you are. I've been looking all over for you," said Victoire as she met Teddy by the Fat Lady. She smiled at him. "Where have you been? You're perspiring all over. It's as if you've been running all over the place." She laughed and pulled him into the Common Room. "Don't worry about the Quidditch Cup. We've gotten something better," she said. Teddy looked at him. "We've won the House Cup," she declared. "No other House could keep up with our points."

The Head Girl looked at him. "And it's all thanks to our Ted Lupin for keeping out of trouble and for answering questions in class no one could answer," she added. Everyone in the room clapped and cheered for Teddy. Teddy smiled as he looked around. He had never imagined that one day the Gryffindor House would clap and cheer for _him._ The Head Girl smiled at Teddy. "For once, you are useful," she pointed out.

The team captain gave him a twisted smile. "I have to admit, you did give it your best shot keeping those blood Bludgers away from our team," he pointed out. The room roared with more cheering. The team captain stood up and shook Teddy's hand. "You're one of the best people I know, Ted," he admitted.

The End-of-the-Year Feast was just as Teddy expected. Everyone gathered around talking happily and talked about summer. Victoire and Teddy sat together, discussing their summer plans. Professor McGonagall would soon announce the winning of the House Cup and everyone would soon be going off for the summer again.

"Students!" The Great Hall grew silent as Professor McGonagall presented herself before the whole of Hogwarts. "Before I tell you all about the last announcements, I want to wish you a happy summer." Everyone cheered. Victoire looked at Teddy and smiled. Teddy smiled back. The both of them looked back at Professor McGonagall who looked pleased. "Now for the announcements that you all have been waiting for. With seven hundred and thirty two points, the House Cup goes to Gryffindor!" The Gryffindor banner appeared and the Great Hall decorated itself with Gryffindor colors.

The Gryffindor table cheered. Glasses clicked. Teddy calmly observed the other people around the table who were all jolly and excited as if they hadn't expected this Victoire leaned on Teddy. Teddy placed his arm around her. The both of them cherished the moment while the others gleefully danced around and celebrated as the Feast began.

The Gryffindor House hadn't won for a while mostly because of Teddy. Although Teddy was smart, he rarely answered in class and cut classes. He got into more trouble than anyone else before. Teddy always had a row with one of the professors, causing Gryffindor to lose so many points. Teddy felt proud that finally they had won. Everyone in the Gryffindor House seemed to have forgotten that he was the cause why Gryffindor had stopped winning for a long time. There were no more hard feelings, or so Teddy thought.

Before they knew it, they were on the train to head back to King's Cross. Teddy looked at Victoire. "I'll be roaming around in a while anyway. I'll see you later," he said and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek before walking off to the prefect compartment. Victoire watched proudly as he did. She had never seen him look so pleased at the end of the term.

Teddy marched down the train. "Get into a compartment," he told the first years who had now grown a bit of a devil's tail. Teddy whipped out his want. "Everyone get in a compartment or I'll shove my wand down your throats," he threatened. A Slytherin boy sneered. Teddy pointed his wand at him. "Try me," he challenged. The Slytherin boy slipped into an empty compartment as the Hogwarts Expressed pushed on and headed back to King's Cross.

"How's the prefect duty going?" Teddy looked at Professor Longbottom who was beaming at him. Teddy smiled back. "You're about come of age soon. Harry's going to throw you a party, isn't he?" he said. Teddy shrugged. Professor Longbottom shook his head. "Knowing Harry, he will. You're like a son to him." Teddy could feel his heart lighten as he heard that statement. Professor Longbottom noticed the glow on Teddy's face. "You've matured," he said.

"Maybe," Teddy replied. He leaned on one of the compartments. "But it's not maturity that counts, is it?" He looked at Professor Longbottom. "How's Natasha?" he asked. Natasha Longbottom is due for Hogwarts soon as well. Teddy had been to her birthday party wants and he takes not of the ages of the children of Harry's friends.

Professor Longbottom grinned. "Oh she's doing fine. She's excited to come to Hogwarts lately. Luna's been pretty calm about explaining to her why she can't attend Hogwarts yet. I'm going to go mad once she asks again when I get home." Teddy laughed, imagining Harry dealing with James in the same way. "Well, you must be off to your duties now. I have to speak to the conductor. Good luck with summer, Ted," he said.

Teddy nodded. "Thanks, you too with Natasha." Professor Longbottom eyed him. Teddy smirked. He turned to go back to the compartment where Victoire stayed in. He slipped past some of the wandering prefects and pretended that he was doing his job. He got to Victoire's compartment with a hassle. "Hey Vicky," he said softly. Victoire's other girlfriends giggled. Teddy looked at them. "Do you mind?" he asked.

"No," the girls chorused. Teddy's blue hair changed to pink. The girls laughed. He sat beside Victoire. One of the girls looked at Teddy. "Can you change your face too?" she asked. Teddy nodded. "Can we see it?" she requested.

Teddy changed his face into a pig snout and the girls laughed. Victoire looked at him. "You look cute with that pig snout on account of how you eat." Teddy pretended to look hurt. Victoire laughed and playfully pushed him. "Oh you have to admit that you _are_ a little glutton, Teddy," she said. She placed her hand on his lap.

**They can't see me**

The two girls stood up. "We'll be moving to the compartment across us," said one of them. She gave Victoire a wink. She turned back to Teddy. "Take care of Vicky. If you make her cry again like before I am going to murder you," she threatened. Teddy laughed. She gave the pair a wave. "You two have fun," she said playfully and disappeared.

Teddy placed his arm around Victoire. "They can be a real pain sometimes," he said. Victoire giggled. "We're alone again, thank God," said Teddy. Victoire nodded. She looked into Teddy's eyes. Teddy looked back at her. "You look beautiful like you do always," he cooed. Victoire smiled at him. Teddy closed his eyes. He leaned over to Victoire. He was surprised to feel her hand touch his lips.

"Not here," hissed Victoire. Teddy smiled at her. Victoire winked. The Hogwarts Express soon came to a stop. Victoire looked out the window. "Oh there's Dad. He's come to pick me up." Teddy turned his hair from pink to brown. Victoire laughed. "Dad doesn't really kind what hair you have, you know," she said as she stood up.

Bill met his daughter as she came down from the train. "I missed you," he said as he gave Victoire a hug. He looked at Teddy and shook his hand. "Glad to see you again, Teddy. Vicky couldn't stop writing about you all year." Teddy smiled. Bill nodded and thumped Teddy on the back. "I hope to hear more from you this summer as well," he said.

Teddy couldn't believe his ears. It was the first time he had heard Bill encourage him date his daughter. Victoire gave him a little wave before going off with her father. Teddy stood in the middle of the crowd, stunned. His hear pumped fast with excitement. He punched the air and rushed back into the train to collect his things.

"Hey Ted!" He turned and saw James standing behind him. Surprised, Teddy looked up and saw Harry. He hadn't expected the father and son to be there o pick him up. James pulled Teddy's hand. "Dad said we could come pick you up so we did. We're going to celebrate Gryffindor winning the House Cup at our place and you're supposed to come," he said. Teddy smiled at him. "Come on, Teddy," he insisted.

Harry nodded to Teddy. "Congratulations," he said. Teddy smiled broadly.

**But I'm still here**

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	13. Last Year

**A/N: ****Thank you to the reviewers**

**I so badly don't want it to end so I made this chapter into two parts. Sorry if it got too short. Hope to see you at the second part supposedly of this chapter. **

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_**September**__** 2015**_

"So," said Harry as Teddy fixed his trunk. "It's your last year." Teddy nodded. Harry smiled at him. "I'm really happy that you stayed in Hogwarts. I never got to do that." Teddy looked thoughtfully at Harry. E turned back to the trunk and took something out. He tossed it to Harry. "You bring this every time you go to Hogwarts?" Harry asked, apparently amazed as he held the stuffed wolf he bought Teddy for Christmas seventeen sixteen years ago.

Teddy nodded with a smile. "I do," he replied. "Dad's got to be with me right?" Harry laughed a bit. He handed the stuffed wolf back to Teddy. Teddy looked at it. "This helped me through my OWLs days. It was hard keeping up with the pace being a prefect and balancing your added duties." Teddy gently placed it back into the trunk. "He watched me study at night," he said.

Harry sat on the chair near him. "I bet he's been teaching you your lessons too." Teddy laughed and nodded joyfully. Harry smiled. "You've grown to be fond of that. I still remember when Ginny picked it out for you years ago." He cast his eyes on the stuffed wolf. "Look at him smile. I see he's very happy that you passed your OWLs with flying colors. How many did you get again?"

"All of them O's, but I had a lot of help from you, Ron, and Grammy," replied Teddy modestly. Harry was surprised to hear Teddy answer that way. He eased himself and watched as his godson close his trunk. Teddy looked up. "I didn't exactly pick out a career you know. McGonagall wanted so badly to see me as an Auror, but I don't think I want to see myself there," he said uncertainly.

"Why not?" asked Harry. "Your mother was an Auror."

**They can't tell me who to be**

Teddy nodded. "I know." He sat on his trunk as it clicked shut. "But I don't want to be in the Ministry." Harry looked disappointed for a bit. He was hoping that his godson would work alongside him. "I want to do something that's never been done before." He looked out the window and slowly smiled. "I want to do something Dad would be proud I did. I know they would be happy if I ended up being an Auror, but I want to be more than that. I want to go around the world in search for a cure for werewolves even if they become a full fledged werewolf," he said.

"But you'll throw away everything you've worked for," protested Harry. "I mean, look at your future ahead of you. Everyone's expecting a lot for you. You're good at Quidditch, you're good at school. You're very much talented. The Ministry of Magic would do lots for you. Besides, searching for those things, I reckon, would not make you money. I thought you wanted to marry Victoire and settle down," he said flatly.

Teddy sighed. "I want to," he said, "but for some reason, I want to help. It hurts to transform into a werewolf once a month." He looked anxiously at the stuffed wolf. "I really want to help them. I don't wan them to be an outcast. I know what it feels like to be looked down upon. I know how it feels to be half-bred. I know how much it hurts for people to not talk to you because of unfortunate background or situation." He looked at Harry. "I love Victoire. She's my life. She was the one who kept me going, but…" his voice faded. Teddy took a deep breath then said, "I don't want to waste everything that's given to me just for me."

**'Cause I'm not what they see.**

Harry thought for a moment. "Does your grandmother know this?" he asked. Teddy shook his head. Harry felt his heart sink. He looked at his godson. Teddy Lupin certainly is an odd boy, an enigma. He thought that Teddy would be indifferent to the people around him as he grew. He never thought that Teddy would be attached to dreams such as helping other people. "You know, you're certainly throwing away all you've learned in Hogwarts," he pointed out.

Teddy shrugged. "So be it," he replied. "But I don't think that's true. There are many things I learned from Defense Against the Dark Arts. Dad was great at that, wasn't he?" Harry nodded. "I think I'd need that to protect myself when I go on my adventures. Besides, there is where I learnt about werewolves. Then there's always Potions, right? I learned so much about making cures there. Slughorn said I was talented. Hogwarts wasn't a waste of time." He looked at his godfather. "If your dad was a werewolf, I don't think you'd end up an Auror. You ended up like your father, didn't you? An Auror?"

Harry finally smiled. "I'm really surprised to see this soft side of yours." He stood up. He held out his hand at Teddy. Teddy hesitated for a moment before shaking Harry's hand. "Whatever you decide, I'm going to be here for you. Whoever you become when you get out of Hogwarts, I'll be right here to support you one hundred and one percent." He pulled the young man into a hug. "You're so much like your father," he said.

Ginny poked her head into the room. "Harry, Teddy, I think it's time for us to go. You'll miss the train if we wait more," she warned. Teddy nodded. Now that he was of age, he could do magic outside school. He levitated his trunk to the other room. Ginny looked at him. She smiled as her eyes landed on the Head Boy badge. "You've finally proven yourself, huh?" she said.

"I think so," replied Teddy. Ginny gave him a one-armed hug. Teddy smiled at her. "James is going to be going to Hogwarts too starting next year. I bet you're going to miss him," he said. "Why are you crying?" asked Teddy as he saw Ginny slowly have tears in her eyes.

Ginny quickly wiped the tears away. "Oh that's nothing," she assured him. "I was just thinking that it wasn't too long ago that you were that little eleven year old and was a lot smaller than me when you first dragged that trunk of yours in here. I can't believe that you're about to graduate from Hogwarts soon. You're not longer a little boy," she said, still looking at Teddy. She seemed like a mother crying because he son would soon graduate.

James suddenly rushed downstairs. "Are we ready to go?" he asked. Ginny turned to him and nodded. James excitedly ran to Teddy. "I can't believe it's really your last year at Hogwarts," he said. Teddy nodded happily. James looked at his father who was standing by the door. "Next year it's going to be my turn," he declared. He turned to Teddy. "Will you still drop me off every start of the term?" he asked Teddy uncertainly.

Teddy ruffled his hair. "Of course." He levitated his trunk easily. Albus and Lily came downstairs too, ready to go and see Teddy off at King's Cross. Before Teddy knew it, they had reached the Hogwarts Express. His grandmother was already there waiting for them. "Hey Grammy," said Teddy as he walked over to her and gave her a tight hug. "I thought you'd never make it," he whispered.

Andromeda looked at him. "And miss seeing off my grandson? Never," she said. She smiled and kissed Teddy on the cheek. "Have a good term. Study hard. Get those NEWTs." Andromeda looked at Teddy's Head Boy badge. "I'm really very proud of you." She gave Teddy another embrace. "Your parents would be really proud of you right now." She slowly let go, but she didn't take her eyes off of him, just like Ginny a while back.

"Teddy!" Teddy looked up and saw Victoire running to him. Bill and Fleur were also there to see her off. Victoire gave Teddy a hug. "I'm sorry we had to be in France the whole summer. I missed you. Thanks for the letter you sent." She looked at Teddy's robes. Her eyes widened. "You've been made Head Boy?" she asked. Teddy nodded. Victoire looked very excited. "That's great." She held out her prefect badge. "This was the surprise I said I was going to tell you."

Teddy beamed. "You've been made prefect too?" He looked at her. He missed seeing here the whole summer. "Being Head Boy is my surprise." Victoire laughed. She slowly let go of Teddy when her parents neared them. "Good morning, Bill, Fleur," he said jovially. He couldn't be prouder as he stood before his girlfriend's parents.

Bill shook hands with Teddy. "I'm really amazed to see this," he said. He studied Teddy's relaxed expression. "You've finally become the man I thought you'd never be." Teddy laughed. Not too long ago Bill thought he wouldn't succeed in life. "I'm glad I decided to give you a chance. You really took care of my daughter during dates and now you took care of yourself really well during school. My daughter could never have a better man."

"It's almost eleven," said Harry, breaking the sentimental moment. The adults ushered the Head Boy and the prefect into the train. "You two have a good term. We'll see you on Christmas!" he said as Victoire and Teddy leaned outside the window. Harry watched as the Hogwarts Express started to move. He turned to Ginny who stood beside him, also watching Teddy and Victoire wave goodbye. "I am going to miss that boy," he murmured.

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	14. Never Believe

**A/N: ****Thank you to the reviewer! Please review this one. Hope you enjoy! D  
**

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_**October 2015**_

"Boo!" Teddy jumped. Victoire laughed as she took off her mask. "I got you this year," she said. She placed her hands on both of Teddy's shoulders. "It's finally Halloween, Teddy. Why are you still killing yourself studying?" she asked as she looked at Teddy's pile of books. "You've been burying yourself in books lately. What's gotten into you?" She felt his forehead. "You're so hot! You're really sick!" she exclaimed jokingly.

Teddy looked at Victoire as he lowered the parchment he was holding. "Vicky, there something that we should talk about," he said earnestly. Victoire's gleeful smile slowly faded at the sigh of Teddy's serious face. Teddy neared her. He could never forgive himself if she cried tonight. He caressed her face. "I will always love you, Vicky. You're going to be the one and only girl in my life," he whispered.

**And the world is still sleepin'**

"What's wrong, Teddy?" asked Victoire worriedly. She took hold of Teddy's hand and pressed it to her face. "Teddy, don't scare me like this." Teddy looked even more serious. "Teddy, don't scare me, please." She looked sideways and saw the very top book: _Werewolves in the Making_. She wildly turned back to Teddy. "Teddy, you aren't...?"

Teddy blinked. "What if I am?" he asked. Victoire's heart started to beat fast. She suddenly took two steps back. She stared at Teddy, horrified. "Vicky, answer me, what if I am? I love you, Vicky. Don't you love me back?" he asked. "Answer me, Vicky. After two years of being together, didn't you love me at all? Vicky…"

"I…" Tears came trickling down Victoire's eyes. Her head spun with a million thoughts. Teddy did prove to her how much he loved her. She couldn't believe that he would end up confirming her worst fear of all. Victoire looked away from Teddy. She wiped her eyes quickly. "Teddy, I do," she sobbed. She felt Teddy near her. "Teddy…" she whispered.

Teddy wrapped her hands around her. "Happy Halloween, Vicky," he whispered, but soon he couldn't help but laugh. "Trick or treat? Since I didn't get any sweets from you this year, I guess trick would be better because I'm so good at it," he said and started to laugh softly.

Victoire pushed him. "God, you scared me Teddy! Damn it!" she cursed, furiously wiping her tears. Teddy laughed and caught her arm. He pulled her closer to him and gave her a kiss on the lips. Victoire, although heart still beating very fast because of Teddy's trick, kissed him back. She ran her fingers through Teddy's golden hair. She slowly broke it off and looked at Teddy's dark brown eyes. "You got me this year too," she whispered.

Teddy chuckled. "Of course. It's my last Halloween at Hogwarts with you," he replied. He walked back to the pile of books. "I just pulled this out from the library last night. I was afraid I wouldn't be able to get a werewolf book." Victoire pretended to look upset. Teddy turned back to the pile of books. "But seriously, I was studying you know," he said.

"But the feast is about to begin," Victoire pointed out, "and you're Head Boy. It's impossible for you to miss the feast. Besides, it's always fun during Halloween. They're putting up the decorations. Come on. Let's help them," she insisted. Teddy sighed and followed Victoire out of the Common Room. "When did you become such a spoil sport, Teddy? You've always wanted to decorate during special occasions," she reminded him.

Teddy and Victoire walked into the Great Hall. Teddy looked around. He saw the professors and students clamoring all around the room, excited for the feast. He looked at Victoire and nodded. The both of them separated to help with the decorations.

"Finally, the Head Boy shows up," said Professor McGonagall. She smiled slightly as she pointed to the ceiling. "You're not too bad at Charms. You think you could handle the ceiling?" she asked. Teddy nodded. Professor McGonagall walked past him. "After you decorate the ceiling, I expect to see you at my office to discuss something. Mind you, don't hurry. The feast isn't for hours and I want to see the ceiling nicely done," she said.

"Yes Professor," said Teddy. Professor McGonagall walked to the direction of her office. Teddy looked at the ceiling and thought of something decorate it. He tilted his head. Slowly, Teddy took out his wand and pointed it at the ceiling. "Let's see, pumpkins are too common. Cats, McGonagall might not like that. What about candles? But that's for the Feast at the start of the year." Teddy thought long and hard. His face lit up as he murmured some enchantments.

"Elves, centaurs, werewolves, wizards, withes, and brooms," muttered Professor Longbottom as he looked at the decoration on of the ceiling that Teddy had created. "Not bad. You've got talent in decoration." Teddy snorted. Professor Longbottom shook his head. "Old habits die hard, doesn't it? It's very well done and I see that the werewolves you have there symbolize something, doesn't it? It's glowing," he said.

Teddy grinned. "It's my trademark," he answered. Professor Longbottom nodded. Teddy looked at his watch. "Oh right, Professor McGonagall asked me to drop by her office. I guess I'll see you Professor Longbottom," he said and walked off toward Professor McGonagall's office. "What does she want?" he asked himself. He reached the Gargoyles and said. "Lime Pop."

Professor McGonagall looked at him. "Have you finished?" she asked. Teddy nodded. "Very well, sit down please," she said. Teddy blinked and did as he was told. He looked around. All the portraits of the past Headmasters seemed to look at him, maybe stare. "I looked through all the files of the seventh years and it seems to me that you, as Head Boy, have the most potential of all the students in the level." Teddy smiled. "But I am curious of something." She walked over to her desk. "You haven't told us what your plans are for your future. You can be anything from here on out, seeing that you took all the classes and you seem to be doing well in all of them. I just want to know," she looked at him closely, "what your plans are. We have been expecting great things from you."

**While I keep on dreamin' for me**

"I," Teddy stopped. Actually, he hadn't decided yet. He hadn't been thinking about it and has been keeping his options open. "I honestly don't know," Teddy confessed flatly. "I told Harry what my plans are and he said he would support me whatever I decide to be, but he looked disappointed as I said it." Professor McGonagall looked at him. "I told him that I wanted to be the first one to discover a potion to turn a fully fledges werewolf back to human."

There was silence between them for a moment. "Is that so?" said Professor McGonagall. She looked Teddy with steady eyes. "Why didn't you tell this to Professor Moore when he questioned you about your future plans two years ago?" she asked. Teddy hung his head. "Look at me Ted Remus," snapped Professor McGonagall. "There is nothing to be ashamed about what you just said. If it is your dream, then so be it. Don't listen to what other people tell you. Follow your dreams, reach your goals. That's what we live life for," she said.

Teddy couldn't believe what he was hearing. Professor McGonagall gave him a twisted smile. She motioned for him to go back to the Great Hall. Without another word, Teddy went back out, feeling refreshed and enlightened. He did not sight on hint of doubt on the Headmistress's face. Teddy happily made his way back to the Great Hall. Finally there was someone who looked very sure of his plans in life that didn't hesitate to back him up on it.

As he walked down the hall, he thought about his past when he felt lonely and lost. He never thought that he would be this way. He was just as surprised as other people were when they saw him change his perspective in things. He could never forget Harry's face when he suggested that they go to his parents' graves one sunny day, summer of 2015.

_Harry looked at Teddy. "To your parents' graves?" he asked again. Teddy nodded. Harry practically stared at Teddy. "Who are you and what have you done to Teddy Lupin?" Teddy laughed. Harry stood straight and fixed his shirt. "I can go with you. I've got nothing better to do anyway. Day offs can be a big bore when you're used to work all day," he said. _

_Teddy smiled. "That's great then," he replied. He and Harry went out of the door. "I would miss going to their graves this November. I've been there twice this month though. I just wanted you to come with me this time. You used to drag me there when I was younger." As they walked, Teddy dug his hands into his pocket. "It's funny how I never wanted to see them before," he said. "I can remember I was very angry with them for some reason. It's upsetting to be there."_

_"I was meaning to ask you why," said Harry. _

_Teddy thought for a moment. "Maybe because I didn't want to accept the reality that I will never have parents. __I was angry that they had to leave me and I didn't understand why. Maybe it was selfishness, maybe it was childish actions, I don't know. The anger became bitterness and I bottled it up in me. I __couldn't cry about it. I just felt scared, lost, and confused. I refused to accept the condolences people said. I didn't want anyone to come into my world in fear that they might hurt me more," he explained in a rather nostalgic tone of voice. _

_Harry smiled. "I remember how you used to throw a tantrum every time we had to go." Teddy nodded thoughtfully. "You were so young then. I couldn't bear seeing that pained face of yours. You looked so troubled. When I tried to tell you comforting words, you shoved it right back at my face. You've changed a lot since then."_

_Teddy looked at Harry. "Thanks to you," he replied. "Thanks to Grammy and Victoire. Thanks to all of you guys who never gave up on me. __If you had given up, I wouldn't be here voluntarily walking to my parents' graves. I still wonder why they had to die sometimes, but I don't really blame them anymore. They love me." Teddy's hair changed to yellow. "And I will never forget that. They died to give me a better place to live in, and I did."_

_"Truth has finally dawned on the young Teddy Lupin," said Harry, placing his hand on his godson's shoulder. Teddy nodded as they reached the cemetery. He lowered the flowers that he had bought from a nearby flower shop. Harry looked at Lupin and Tonks's graves. "I bet they're really happy to see you now that you've moved on and decided to believe us," he whispered. _

_Teddy crouched down and touched his parents' names that were engraved on the stones. "They are." He could never feel any happier. __He had finally let go of all the hurt and bitterness he had towards his parents and come to accept the fact that they are gone, but not forever. They will always be with him, and he knew it. Teddy tapped his pocket where he kept the picture he had found inserted by his father in a journal. He whispered, "They are very happy."_

Teddy shook himself out of his thoughts. He heard footsteps rushing towards his way. He drew out his wand in case it was another Slytherin who wanted to pull a fast one on him. Teddy walked towards the sound of the rushing footsteps, his wand held out.

Victoire met him halfway. "I was going to go get you." She looked very grim. Teddy looked at her worriedly. "No, it's not me," she said in a low voice. She grabbed Teddy's hand. "Come on. Don't make any noise and I'll show you what's happening at the Great Hall." Teddy followed Victoire through the halls as they made their way to the Great Hall.

**And their words are just whispers**

Everyone was looking up at the ceiling. "Look at that glowing werewolf," said a Ravenclaw. "I bet it was that Head Boy who decorated this. Who would want a werewolf for a decoration? It disgusts me to see it up there." She walked away from the crowd and went back to fixing the tables. "They shouldn't've made him Head Boy," she said.

Another student looked disapprovingly at the ceiling. "I don't really mind him being Head Boy, but they shouldn't have let him decorate it. It's typical of Ted Lupin to put up House elves and Centaurs and Werewolves up there." She shook her head. "They should change that decoration. I can't stand looking at odd creatures up there. It ruins Halloween."

"Isn't that juvenile?" piped up one of the Hufflepuff students. "He should act more grown up right now. I bet he's going to reason this out as _missing Daddy so I put this up_. The teachers would all go soft on him and tell him how wonderful the decorations are because he's lost his parents. I heard that the Lupins didn't even die because of battle."

"Maybe it's just a cover up story?" One of the other Hufflepuff students suggested. "But I hear his mother was a Hufflepuff, wasn't she? Maybe his father killed his mother in the end so that…you know couples…" she said, her voice fading. Some of the others laughed.

One of the Slytherin boys came up to them. "So you're suggesting that they killed each other for the heck of it?" The girl shrugged. The Slytherin boy nodded approvingly. "It could be true." He looked up at the ceiling. "Like my father said, keep away from werewolves. They can never be trusted. Lupin's mother was foolish to marry one," he said.

"Ted Lupin must be loco as his father to put that up," said one of the other Ravenclaw girls. "It's glowing too. I don't agree in spreading rumors, but I think what you said is true. It is foolish to marry a werewolf. How do we know Teddy Lupin isn't a werewolf himself? If he could inherit his mother's Metamorphmagi status, how do we know he didn't get his father's werewolf blood?" she asked.

A Gryffindor girl rolled her eyes. "Then he wouldn't be with us every night when there is a full moon. Tonight is a full moon and he decorated…" She looked at the ceiling and cringed. "Though I don't agree with the decorations either. I think his parents aren't dead though. Remember Ted Lupin from before? Remember how nasty he was? Maybe they disowned him so he tamed down lately," she said.

Her Slytherin friend beside her nodded eagerly. "And we know who tamed our little were-pup," she said smirking. "That Weasley Veela."

"Imagine a werewolf and a Veela getting married," cried out another. The girl drew a picture on midair using her wand. An ugly creature of what she thought Teddy and Victoire's child would be appeared. Everyone laughed. "A very nice kid it would be," she said sarcastically as everyone laughed even more as the picture she drew walked and suddenly disappeared.

**And lies that I'll never believe**

Teddy grabbed Victoire's arm. He could see her getting upset now. "Don't listen to them," he whispered. "Let's go. We don't need to be in the feast anyway. Let's just go up to the Owelry." Victoire hesitated for a moment, but then followed Teddy. Teddy held Victoire's hand tightly. He would never believe the things they say.

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	15. Leaving

**A/N: ****Thank you to the reviewers! Please review this one too, thanks!  
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_**June**__** 2016**_

"Vicky…" Victoire turned her back on Teddy. Teddy sighed. "Victoire, I'm sorry. What do you want me to do? It'll be okay. We'll be together again. It'll take one more year for you to graduate from Hogwarts anyway. Victoire please look at me," Teddy pleaded. Victoire started to sob. Teddy was about to hold her, but decided against it. "Victoire, I'm really sorry. I didn't mean for it to come to you as a shock. You know I love you," he reassured Victoire.

"Go away," was all Victoire said. She ran up the stairs and slammed the door to her room.

Teddy sighed and looked away. He fought back his own tears. Bill suddenly came out from the kitchen. "She'll come around," he assured Teddy. He placed a hand on Teddy's shoulder. "I know what you feel. Once Victoire thinks about it, I'm sure she'll understand you." Teddy didn't look at Bill. He lowered his head and tried his hardest not to let his tears fall. He wasn't a boy anymore. "Ted, it's going to be all right," said Bill.

**And I want a moment to be real**

"You're not angry with me?" asked Teddy. He still couldn't look at Bill. "You told me to take care of her and I promised. Now she's crying up there while I'm down here being useless." Teddy took a deep breath. "I never meant for this to happen. I do want to be with her. I do love her with all my heart. I just want to do something to help. I consider myself fortunate, but there are other people out there, werewolves out there, who feel worse than I do now. I want to help them. My Dad was one of them," he explained.

"I know," Bill said softly. "I too almost became one of them." Teddy spun. He didn't know it. Bill nodded. "I was also bitten by a werewolf when I was a boy, but luckily they had the potion by that time so I was saved. I can understand how you feel. Victoire is just a girl, try to understand her. She'll come around after a while. It will take some days. When do you plan to leave?" he asked.

Teddy replied sulkily, "Next week. Grammy is also in a shock so I can't leave right now. Ginny tried to persuade me not to. Only Harry was there telling me that I should go for it if I wanted to. He told me to keep an open mind and maybe come back here and join the Ministry, settle in like everyone does, if I'm finished." Teddy looked confused. "I don't know what else to do, Bill."

Bill thumped Teddy's back. "Harry's right. Keep your options open," he replied. "You hold your head up high. You deserve everyone's support. They're just in a state where they can't believe what they're hearing. All of them will come around." He looked into Teddy's eyes. "You just stay focused on your dreams. Be careful and come back safe. We don't want you turning into our worst nightmares," he said with a smile to try to cheer Teddy up.

Teddy looked at him. "Can I talk to Vicky?" he asked. Bill nodded. Teddy moved up the stairs uncertainly. He made his way to Victoire's room and knocked at her door. "Vicky, it's me," he whispered. He pressed his ears to her door. He felt heartbroken when he heard her sobbing. "Vicky, please. Let me explain. I want to talk to you," he said.

Teddy felt a thud that threw him back from the door. Apparently, Victoire had thrown a pillow at it. "I told you to go away!" she cried. Teddy leaned on Victoire door as Victoire buried her head on her pillow. "I never want to see you ever again, Teddy. Don't ever come near me again! I hate you! Go away and leave me alone!" she cried.

"I love you, Victoire Weasley, now and forever," he whispered, clearly enough for Victoire to hear through the door. He kissed his fingers and pressed it to Victoire's door. "Even if you don't want anything to do with me anymore, I want you. I love you. I'll always be here when you need me." He felt tears coming up his eyes, but he didn't let it flow. "I love you so much." Teddy turned around and went back downstairs.

Victoire sat up from her bed. She heard the front door close. She ran to the window and watched Teddy walk away. She wanted so badly to call him back, but she couldn't seem to find her voice. Teddy grew further from her area of vision. Victoire's eyes blurred with so much tears that built up. She couldn't bear to watch Teddy go.

"Are you all right?" asked Harry. Teddy nodded and looked away from his godfather. "Don't look so down. You're going next week. You should prepare yourself emotionally as well if you truly want to dedicate your life to finding the cure to werewolves." Teddy didn't reply. Harry sat on the chair beside him. "You know what? I was placed in your spot once," he said.

Teddy finally looked at Harry. Harry nodded. "I never told you?" he asked. Teddy shook his head. Remember I told you about the Horuxes Dumbledore asked me to find." Teddy slowly nodded. He didn't know where this was going. "I wanted to keep Ginny safe at the same time I had to follow Dumbledore. My heart was torn in two. Half of it wanted to stay with Ginny, half of it knew that I had to do what I had to. Well, in the end, both happened." He looked at Teddy. "If you truly dream to change the world, Teddy, there are sacrifices that you must give up."

Teddy took a deep breath. "Vicky looked so upset. She cried, Harry. I've never made her cry since we started going out." He buried his face on his hands. "I feel like a loser. Victoire had always been there for me and when she needed me at her side, I couldn't be. I feel like a worthless boyfriend." He shook his head. "Victoire deserves someone better than me," he said in a low voice.

Harry smiled at him. "You don't believe that one bit, do you?" he said softly. Teddy didn't reply. "You know as well as I do that Victoire could never have a better man than you. She'll come around. She'll wait for you. Victoire loves you as much as you love her." Teddy's hair slightly turned yellow, but half of it was still black. "Don't give up hope. Just trust your instincts and everything will fall into place. Besides, Vicky won't be going anywhere for two years," he pointed out.

"I'm going back to my house now," said Teddy as he stood up. His face still showed a lot of puzzlement and Harry knew that he wasn't as sure as he was supposed to be. Teddy held out his hand at Harry. "Thanks for being the best godfather there is in the world," he said. Harry smiled and nodded. He watched as Teddy marched of his house. He knew that Teddy wouldn't return through the door again, not for a long time.

Teddy threw his backpack to his bag. He went downstairs and found his grandmother sitting on the couch looking very sullen. He walked up to her. She looked at him sadly. Teddy knelt down beside her and held her hands to his cheek. He did that to calm her down. Andromeda slowly touched Teddy's face. She couldn't bear to see his grandson _throw_ his life away. Many times she had tried to convince him to settle down and try a sensible job, but Teddy wouldn't listen to her.

"You break my heart, do you know that?" said Andromeda. Teddy looked at her. Andromeda ran her frail finger through Teddy's brown hair. "You could just stay here with me." Teddy looked away. He didn't want to see her sad eyes look at him. "I'm not getting any younger. What if I don't get to see you again?" she asked.

"I can't promise you anything, Grammy," said Teddy, "but I know we both know that we love each other. I know I've been a lot of trouble for you, especially in my early years at Hogwarts, but I never failed to understand how much you love me. I am who I am right now because of you, Grammy." Andromeda started to cry when Teddy said this. Teddy stood up and embraced his grandmother. "Don't worry, Grammy. I'll be back, I promise. I will be back this Christmas. We'll celebrate it together, all right?"

Andromeda looked at him thoughtfully. "One year, Teddy," she whispered. "I'll give you one year and you stop that if you don't move an inch at your researches." Teddy looked at her. He knew he couldn't promise. Andromeda gripped Teddy's hands tightly. "Promise me, Teddy. Promise me you'll come back and settle down after a year," she insisted. Teddy had never seen her so stubborn.

Teddy shook his head. "I can't, Grammy. What's the point of going now if I'm just going to give up?" he asked. Andromeda bawled. Teddy felt her hand shake as she held him. Teddy felt guilty. All the people around him, he had made them all cry. They loved him so much that they couldn't see him go. "Mum and Dad will be with me," Teddy managed to say through Andromeda's bawls. "They'll look after me. You always said they'll be with me wherever I go."

Teddy walked out of the door. He felt his chest ache as he closed the door behind him. He was about to leave the only home he knew. He looked back for a moment. Gripping his wand tighter, Teddy walked down the porch. He stopped for a moment. He looked back at saw the bench that sat outside the house. There were so many memories.

**Wanna touch things I don't feel**

_"Come here, Teddy," cooed Andromeda softly as the crying three-year-old marched up to him. He had fallen from his toy broom and was evidently hurting. Andromeda took him to her lap. She rocked Teddy __until he calmed down. "That's a good boy," she whispered. She carried him to the bench and sat him there. "Where does it hurt?" Andromeda asked. Teddy just cried. "Here?" asked Andromeda as she touched Teddy's arm. Teddy shook his head. "Here?" Andromeda touched his leg. Teddy again shook his head. Andromeda thought for a moment. "Here?" she asked as he touched his chest. __Teddy finally nodded. Andromeda threw her arms around him. "Oh Teddy."_

_"Why does it hurt so much?" Teddy asked innocently. He had stopped crying, but he still felt his aching chest. "Grammy, make it stop hurting. It hurts!"_

_Andromeda nodded understandingly. "I know it hurts, Teddy." She felt her heart sink as she looked at the little boy's pained face. He didn't understand yet, but Andromeda did. He felt a void in his heart that he couldn't explain. Teddy's red hair turned black. Tears appeared in his eyes again and he started to complain more about his hurting chest. "I'm sorry, Teddy, but there is nothing I could do to mend it," she said sadly. _

_"Why?" Teddy asked. He suddenly felt angry. "You always fix __my boo boos__…"_

_Andromeda shook her head. "I can't fix this one," she said quietly. __She wanted to hug his grandson one more time, but he looked very upset. "Want me to fix you pumpkin juice?" she asked. Teddy shook his head. Andromeda thought for a moment. "How about we go to Diagon Alley and get some Chocolate Frogs?" she suggested. Teddy again shook his head. _

_"I don't want to go anywhere. It hurts, Grammy!" he cried. __"Make it stop."_

_"I can't make it stop," Andromeda replied exasperatedly, though God knows how much she wanted to. She held the crying child in her arms. "I'm sorry I can't make it stop, Teddy. Please stop crying," she whispered. Teddy cried even more. Andromeda sat on the bench and placed the boy on her lap. "I can't make it stop and crying will just make it worse." Teddy didn't stop crying. She rocked Teddy a little. "Teddy, please stop crying. Grammy loves you so much."_

_"I want my Mummy!" he cried. Andromeda was astonished to hear this. It wasn't too long ago when she told him about his mother. __Teddy looked at Andromeda with a tear strained face. "Harry took me to the park. Everyone was with their Mummy! I want my Mummy!"_

_Andromeda rocked Teddy until he calmed down. "I know you want your Mummy and so do I," she whispered. Teddy yawned. He fell asleep in his grandmother's arms. Andromeda kissed Teddy's forehead. "Mummy will visit you in your dreams, Little Love. She will always be with you, and so will Daddy. You three will always be together." _

_Teddy halfheartedly nodded until he dozed off. _

Teddy shook himself away from his daydream. He looked at the sky. "Accio Firebolt," he muttered. His broom came flying towards him. Teddy took a deep breath before mounting the broom. He kicked off from the ground and hovered for a while. "I'm sorry," he muttered before pulling the broom higher and going into the sky.

Teddy decided to drop by Victoire's house before actually leaving. He flew to the Shell Cottage. He made sure that he wasn't seen by Victoire who apparently was reading a book. He watched her as she turned. She was very beautiful in his eyes; the only beautiful girl there is in the world. He wanted to reach out and touch her, but he knew he couldn't do this, not with her being furious with him. He studied her face. She doesn't seem to be very much upset anymore. He relaxed his arms and just stared at her. He wanted time to stop at that moment.

**Wanna hold on and feel I belong**

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	16. Not The Expected Christmas

**A/N: ****Thank you to the reviewers! Hope you like this one! Please review!  
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_**December 2016**_

Harry opened the door. "God it's so cold out there." Harry smiled widely when he found his godson looking back at him. Teddy threw aside his jacket. "What's wrong? It's as if you're seeing a ghost," he said calmly. Harry quickly pulled the young man into a hug. He hadn't seen him in months. Teddy smiled and hugged Harry back. "I wrote to you, didn't I?" Harry looked at him for a moment and shook his head. Teddy raised an eyebrow. "I wrote to you saying I would be dropping by for Christmas."

"I didn't get any letter," Harry replied. Teddy grabbed his jacket from the floor. Harry studied him from head to foot. Teddy surely got a little thinner. His eyes had the darkened; evident that he had many sleepless nights. But Harry could see Teddy smile, a real smile. He had been waiting for so long for this moment to come. "I'm glad you're safe," he finally said. He let Teddy in. "Dinner's about to be served. Have a seat," he said.

Teddy politely declined the offer. "I'm going home to Grammy. I miss her so much." His eyes dazzled at the mentioning of his grandmother. In the months that he had gone off, he thought about home quite often. He never realized that life would be so hard to live alone without a bed, but he managed to live it through and come home to the place he knew. Harry's face suddenly turned into a frown. "What's wrong, Harry?" Teddy asked.

Harry looked concerned. "Have a seat. This time it's not an offer." Teddy awkwardly walked to the couch. Harry bit his lower lip as he looked out the dumbfounded teenager. "Teddy, I want you to listen to me," he said slowly. Teddy's heart skipped a beat. He could tell by Harry's face that it was some bad news. "Your grandmother, she…" his voice faded. Teddy didn't need to be told to understand. He stood up and was about to head to the door when Harry grabbed his arm. "Don't go outside," he said.

**And how can they say I never change**

"Grammy!" Teddy yelled. Harry held him back. Ginny and the Potter kids rushed downstairs at the sound of Teddy's yell. Ginny clasped her hand to her mouth. James held on to the handrails. Lily grabbed Albus shirt. Teddy slowly dropped to the ground. Harry held him as he did. "I promised to see her this Christmas. I promised to see her…" his voice trailed off as he sobbed.

During the months that he was away from home, Teddy thought of his grandmother. As he did his research and collected his ingredients, he thought of the home he had come to know. It kept him alive. It kept him safe. The thought of going home for Christmas kept pushing him to finish all he could before December rolled in.

Teddy had sleepless nights. He studied werewolves from afar. Many times he felt weak and wanted to give up and go home, but the thought of his father pushed him. He needed to know what the cure would be to help the other werewolves. As he scribbled notes on his parchments, he thought of his father's face and smiled and went on.

When he felt aimless, he thought of Harry who taught him how to reach his goals, how to aim higher than he ever could. He thought of his godfather's encouraging words, his fatherly voice. Teddy managed to work under pressure. He managed to observe the werewolves he watched under his vigilant eyes. Harry had taught him to focus, that he could never do without it. Harry was a Seeker. He had taught Teddy how to reach out further, to grab that one small goal. Teddy was never aimless at the thought of Harry's advices.

When he felt lonely, he thought of Victoire. She was the person who told him he'd grow up lonely. He held on to the thought that she would be waiting for him when he got back. She would be back from Hogwarts too by then. He dismissed the thought of her saying that she hated him. He knew too well that it wasn't true and it was only a result of utter shock to make her say that. He imagined holding her like he did before he graduated Hogwarts. It comforted him and reminded him that he wasn't alone.

When he felt unloved, he thought of the one person that showed him so much love, his grandmother. Even though she was also hurting for she lost a husband, a daughter, and a son-in-law; she raised Teddy with so much affection and care. She was there to calm him down when he cried. She was beside him when he was doubtful. She was there to hold him close when he missed his parents. Teddy knew many times he broke her heart, but Andromeda continued to love him throughout the years.

_"You break my heart, do you know that?" said Andromeda. Teddy looked at her. Andromeda ran her frail finger through Teddy's brown hair. "You could just stay here with me." Teddy looked away. He didn't want to see her sad eyes look at him. "I'm not getting any younger. What if I don't get to see you again?" she asked._

Harry looked at Teddy. "We tried to contact you. We tried to write to you. No owls seem to reach you." Teddy's pained face made his heart ache. He knew how much it hurt to lose your parents then someone you loved and cared for next. It had happened to him when Sirius fell through the veil. "Teddy, I'm sorry," he whispered.

"I broke her heart," Teddy sniffed. "She told me not to leave. She asked me to stay with her and I didn't I left her." Teddy tried to break free from Harry, but his godfather held him tightly. "Harry, let me go, please," he said. Harry shook his head. The eighteen-year-old had gotten stronger even though he had gotten thinner. "She said…She told me…She knew…" Teddy huffed. He didn't know what else to do at the moment.

The same feeling that he had when he was a child burst inside him again. His heart burned. He didn't understand why his grandmother had to leave him. He didn't know why she didn't wait for him to come home. He promised her that he would return for Christmas. Why didn't she wait for him? Anger dug deep into his emotions, the same anger that he felt for his parents when they left him. Teddy's head spun as he broke down.

James had never seen Teddy cry like that. He felt scared. He looked at Ginny who was now tearing too. He held the handrails tighter. He wanted Teddy to smile. He looked at Albus and Lily who looked just as helpless. James turned his attention back to Teddy. Color drained from his face as he watched Teddy cry in agony.

**They're the ones that stay the same**

"They always leave me," Teddy finally said, calming down. His anger still burned in his mind. He looked at Harry and wiped his tears. "Damn, they always do. They always tell me that they won't, but they do." He took a deep breath. It was only then when he realized that Ginny and the Potter kids were looking at him too. He shifted his eyes back to Harry. "When did she?" he asked. He wiped away the tears in his eyes. Deep inside, he felt embarrassed for throwing a tantrum.

Harry stood up. He held out his hand to help Teddy up too. "October," he answered quietly. Teddy stood up. He felt lost for a moment. Harry calmly led him to the fireplace. "It's cold. Warm yourself up first. We'll have dinner in a while. Anything you'd like?" he asked. Teddy shook his head. Harry left him to his thoughts knowing that it would be the best.

Teddy stared at the fire. He felt its warmth, the warmth he had never felt in a long time. He didn't understand why he felt cold somewhere. Somewhere in side him he felt as if he was freezing like ice. He didn't know what to do. He felt like a little boy lost. He prayed silently that it all be a nightmare, but he knew that it was finally reality that he was facing.

_"I hope one day life smacks at your face and you'll realize how stupid you are right now. I will not be there to put my arm around you when that time comes. You are on your own, Ted Lupin. You hear me? ON YOUR OWN!"_

Teddy knew that this would actually happen. He thought of the Howlers his grandmother sent him throughout his years at Hogwarts. He couldn't stop blaming himself. He was stupid, so stupid. He was the cause of her death. He made her suffer so much. Teddy had already known that his grandmother aged and weakened throughout the year, but he never thought that he would lose her. He gave her so much pain in raising him, and Teddy knew he would never forgive himself for doing so. He closed his eyes and wished his grandmother was beside him to tell him everything was going to be all right, but she was gone.

The Potter kids neared him. "Teddy?" Teddy looked at James. His dark brown eyes looked comforting. James sat beside Teddy. "I'm sorry about your grandmother," he whispered. Teddy didn't reply. James looked at him thoughtfully. "When we invited her over, she talked a lot about you. She told us how proud she was that you decided to use your knowledge for the greater good, as your father would put it, she said," he informed.

Teddy's face softened. "She said that?" James nodded. Albus and Lily nodded as well. Apparently the Potters had quite often invited her over. Teddy felt relieved that Andromeda didn't have to be alone. He made a mental note to thank Harry later. Teddy looked at James. He smiled for him. "Happy Christmas, James," he said He looked at the other two. "Happy Christmas, Albus, Lily."

Albus smiled back. "Happy Christmas, Teddy," he replied. He looked back. "I think dinner's ready. I'm really hungry." He turned back to Teddy. "Let's have dinner. Mum's the best as roast chicken now, Uncle Ron said. She's really great at making Christmas dinner." He took hold of Teddy's hand and tugged it. "Let's go, Teddy," he urged.

As Teddy sat, Ginny gave him a quick hug. "You look peaky," she said softly. Teddy smiled faintly. She placed a plate of rice in front of him. "Eat as much as you can tonight. I'll be upstairs fixing your bed. You stay over for a week or so." With her tone of voice, Teddy knew it wasn't an offer. He had to. Ginny placed a cup of hot cocoa beside his plate. "It's Christmas Eve, relax tonight, please. We'll talk about other concerns tomorrow."

That night, Teddy had a hearty dinner, though everyone was silent as they ate. Even Lily who usually spoke during meals fell completely silent. Teddy felt awkward, but relieved. He wanted some time to think as he ate. His head spun with so many questions. He felt the four walls closing on him. He considered running away, but he had already done that. This time, he had to face his problems. He was no longer a boy. He had grown to be a man.

Harry led Teddy to his room. "It's been a while since you didn't have covers." Teddy nodded. Harry watched as Teddy lamely made his way to the bed. Harry felt for him. Don't worry. Everything is going to be all right. I hope you don't mind, but some of the Weasleys are coming over tomorrow. I'm sure Vicky would be glad to see you." Teddy lowered his head. "She missed you a lot. She loves you, Teddy."

Teddy looked up. "Can I go to the cemetery tomorrow?" was all he asked. Harry nodded and offered to go with him. Teddy shook his head. "I think I can manage alone. Besides, it's Christmas tomorrow. Christmas is time for the family. You be with yours and I be with mine." Harry could sense the sadness in Teddy's voice as he said it.

Harry looked at him understandingly. "If that's what you want." He gazed into Teddy's eyes. "But you do know that you have a family here right?" Teddy halfheartedly nodded. Harry tilted his head. "Ted, listen to me. Everything in this world happens for a reason." He walked nearer to Teddy. Teddy looked at Harry's earnest eyes. Somehow, the cold feeling inside him started to feel warm. "You have a family in here with us. You're like a son to me and you'll always be."

That night as Teddy lay on his bed, he pondered about what Harry had said. He thought about his past where Harry acted like a stand-in father. Harry had never failed to treat him equally along with the Potter kids. Harry was never biased when he took his family to the mall. He included Teddy in all of their trips. Teddy found a second home in Godric's Hollow.

_"Teddy suit up. __We're going to the mall." Eight-year-old Teddy looked at his godfather. He had been looking gloomy because his grandmother had no time to take him to the park. __Harry smiled at him. "I've already told your grandmother that I'd take you with me. Little James is going to. You'll have fun when you go there," he assured the little boy. _

_Teddy stood up and dashed to his room. He rummaged his closet for a pair of jeans and a pressed shirt. He stood before Harry after dressing. Harry laughed at Teddy's speed. Teddy's green hair turned bright red. It reminded Harry of h__is own best friend, Ron Weasley every time Teddy's hair turned red. __Harry ruffled Teddy's hair as the both of them left the house. _

_"Bye Grammy!" Teddy yelled and waved at his grandmother who was doing some gardening. Andromeda waved back at him. Teddy turned back to Harry. "Are we going to check out the new pictures that don't move again?" he asked innocently. Suddenly white flashed. Teddy turned. "Grammy!" he called and tried to reach out. "Grammy!"_

**I'm the one now**

"Grammy!" Teddy yelled as he kicked off his covers. He opened his eyes and sat up. He found himself sweating all over, and panting too. Teddy took a deep breath. He looked across the room and found his stuffed wolf sitting on the desk. Harry must've put it there. Teddy walked over to the desk and picked up the stuffed wolf. "Harry's right," he muttered to himself. He gently placed the stuffed wolf back and went back to bed, dreaming a sweet dream the rest of the night.

The next day, Christmas. Teddy stretched his legs out. It had been a long time since the last time he was able to sleep on a comfortable bed. He yawned and stood up. He put on his jacket and went downstairs to get himself breakfast before heading to the cemetery. All he needed last night was some sleep to get his thinking straight.

"Teddy?" Teddy turned. Time stopped. He gazed upon the most beautiful thing in the world. Victoire seemed to grow taller, and yes, has turned more womanly as well. Victoire just stared at him for a second. The next thing Teddy knew, Victoire had her arms around him. "I thought I would never see you again," she whispered.

Teddy slowly responded by wrapping his arms around her as well. "I promised never to leave you, right?" he said. Victoire nodded. Teddy lowered his head and kissed Victoire on the forehead. "I really missed you, Vicky. I thought about you all the time while I was away." He held Victoire closer to him. "Now I know that I really need you and I don't want to leave you again." Victoire buried her face on Teddy's chest. "Happy Christmas, Vicky," Teddy finally said.

**'Cause I'm still here**

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	17. I'm Still Here Finale

**A/N: ****Thank you to the reviewers. This is the finale of the story! Thank you for reading and reviewing it!**

** Hope you have enjoyed reading it as much as I did writing.  
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_**September 2017**_

Albus tore down the stairs. Teddy laughed as he saw him trip. Albus had been excited about Hogwarts all summer. All he could talk about was Hogwarts, which House he might be in, and what position he'd play for the House team. Teddy couldn't blame him. First year is really the best year in Hogwarts, getting to know about magic in a way you've never gotten to know before is the best magic there is.

"Slow down," said Teddy as he caught Albus's collar. "We're going to Hogwarts Express. Don't worry. You won't get left behind." Albus looked at him. Teddy ruffled Albus's hair. Albus pulled away from Teddy. Teddy chuckled as he watched the eleven-year-old boy run into the kitchen to fix himself breakfast, something he only did out of excitement most of the time.

Harry came down the stairs, scratching his head. "What's all the commotion about?" he asked. He looked at his watch. "It's only six in the morning. How come you're all up so early?" He looked at Teddy. "And how come you're here so early? Work isn't for hours." Harry slapped his forehead. "How could I forget? First of September," he muttered.

"Apparently," Teddy started, "your son is already fixing breakfast. He was already awake when I got here." Teddy darted his eyes as the hyperactive Albus as he fixed a sandwich. "He had already finished making his last packing. He was doing it when I got here." Teddy threw his hair back. He looked at Harry. "Victoire made it. She's finally Head Girl." Harry smiled and nodded. Teddy smiled back. "I knew she could do it. In a couple of years, maybe Albus would also become prefect or Head Boy. With you as his father, maybe a Quidditch Captain," he suggested.

Harry laughed. "If he could keep up with his homework, that is." He watched as his son ran thru and fro the kitchen. "I had never seen him move so fast since his mother threatened to lock the broom shed. He must be really worked up to go to Hogwarts." Harry turned back to Teddy. He studied his godson for a moment. For some reason, Teddy looked different.

**I'm the one**

Since his grandmother died, Teddy lived in his house alone. Everything was left in his hands. Teddy struggled for a couple of months. He found a decent job working for the Daily Prophet to earn money and have a steady income. This went on for a couple of months until Teddy decided to aim for a higher cause. Although he hadn't let go of his fantasy of helping werewolves, Teddy took an Auror test, which he undoubtedly passed with flying colors. It took a while for life to get back to normal, but with a lot of help from the people around him; Teddy managed to steady himself and learned to stand on his own.

Harry was amazed at the boy's determination to live his own life. Many times Harry offered for Teddy to live at Godric's Hollow, but Teddy insisted that he was old enough to live on his own. Not wanting to rid of the memories he had of the family he knew, most particularly his grandmother, Teddy was reluctant to leave his house. He found being in the home he knew comforting.

From time to time, Harry went with Teddy to visit Andromeda, Lupin, and Tonks's graves. Harry watched Teddy's reaction and always found him looking calm and peaceful every time they went to the cemetery. Teddy finally understood the nature of living life. Sometimes life doesn't go his way. Harry could see that Teddy had finally come to accept this fact and not be bitter against it, even after Andromeda's sudden passing.

Harry snapped out of his thoughts when Albus pulled on his pajamas. "Dad, you better hurry up." He pointed to the clock which said it was only six-thirty in the morning. "We're not going to be late for the train, right? What if it leaves me behind? Dad, you have to wake up Mum and James and Lily or the Hogwarts Express might leave me behind," he said looking nervously. "Please, Dad. Can we go?" he asked. "We went early when it was James who started school!"

Harry sighed. "It's _too_ early, son." He yawned and looked at Teddy. "I guess you came here so you could come along and see Albus off?" Teddy nodded eagerly. Harry gave him a twisted smile. "And let me guess. Victoire Weasley as well?" Teddy nodded curtly. Harry ruffled Albus's hair. "Come on, son. Let's see what you've done for breakfast." Albus trotted over to the kitchen pulling his father along with him.

"Teddy? Is that you?" Teddy looked up and saw Ginny coming down from the stairs. She fixed her hair. "You're so early today." She looked at the clock. "Al is already awake, isn't he?" Teddy nodded. Ginny laughed a bit. "He was so excited since yesterday. He was nervous too, I guess. He had been asking me if being placed in Slytherin is all bad." Teddy looked at Albus's direction thoughtfully. Ginny blinked. "By the way, why did you come here so early?"

"To see the boys off," Teddy replied quickly.

"And Victoire!" Harry added from the kitchen. Teddy turned scarlet. Ginny laughed. Harry came out from the kitchen eating a sandwich. "I never knew Albus had a talent for making breakfast." He held the sandwich out to his wife. "Have a taste, it isn't bad. I think he got your cooking skills." Ginny smirked. "But it's true. I think he did," said Harry defiantly. Harry grudgingly took another bite from the sandwich as he looked at Ginny giggle.

**'Cause I'm still here**

"Yes James, we're taking the car," said Harry when he saw James hesitate in putting his trunk in the car. "Ron wanted us to meet there b car, for some reason." He looked at his daughter who was already seated on the backseat. "Good girl, Lily. In two years, you'd be able to go to Hogwarts too," he said encouragingly.

Lily frowned. "But I want to go now!" she protested.

Harry shook his head. "You can't yet. You're too young. Don't look at me like that. It's Hogwarts rule, not mine." Harry started the car. He saw Teddy walk past it. "You're not coming with us?" Teddy shook his head. Harry smiled. "We'll meet you at King Cross, all right?" Teddy nodded and Apparated away. Harry watched and leaned back on the car seat. "Young love," he muttered to himself as the rest of his family piled into the car.

Teddy stood in the middle of the crowd. He had never seen King's Cross so busy before, or he had just missed seeing it since he hadn't been there for a long time. Teddy looked at the barrier, Platform 9 ¾ then smiled. He could recall how scared he was to go through the barrier years back when he was eleven, though he would never admit it. Teddy watched as potential new first years nervously crossed the barrier.

"Ted!" Teddy spun and saw the Potter family walking towards him. Ginny placed his hand on his shoulder. "Can you do me a favor? I've got this meeting at the Daily Prophet this afternoon but I doubt I can make it. Can you slip a note to Garvin about it?" Teddy nodded. Ginny smiled. "Thanks Teddy." She turned to her children. "Now one by one you go through the barrier." She flashed her eyes at James. "And you stop scaring your brother or you can kiss your Firebolt goodbye."

Teddy looked at Harry. "I'm going to go on ahead," he said. "There are some…things I have to do." Harry nodded and watched as Teddy crossed the barrier. Teddy looked around. Steam covered his eyes. He then spotted the people he had been looking for. "Bill! Victoire," he said as he walked to the father and daughter who seemed to be talking animatedly about something.

**I'm still here**

Victoire turned and looked at him. "Oh Teddy, I thought you wouldn't come." She looked at her father who nodded. Victoire pulled Teddy aside and led him as far away as possible from her father. "You told me you were unsure you could come and I thought it was a plain way of putting that you wouldn't. I'm really happy to see you here." Victoire's eyes sparkled before Teddy's. "You're really the best friend anyone could have," said Victoire.

"Just a friend?" asked Teddy, raising an eyebrow.

Victoire laughed. "More than a friend," she said. Teddy smiled and held her close to him. They had never been this close to each other in public before. Victoire giggled as she felt Teddy's fingers tickle her back. She looked at Teddy. "I'm going to graduate this year, Ted," she declared. Teddy nodded. "Then we'll be able to be together, like before."

Teddy smiled at her. "We will?" Victoire nodded. Teddy caressed her face. "You look beautiful like you always do," he said. Victoire smiled at him. She couldn't take her eyes off of Teddy. She would miss him once again when she goes off to Hogwarts. "I'll see you in December, all right?" Victoire nodded and was about to turn when Teddy caught her arm. Without hesitation, he pressed his lips against Victoire's. Much to his delight, Victoire responded willingly.

Teddy placed his hands on Victoire's waist. Victoire placed hers on is shoulders. Teddy didn't want it to end. He had missed his Victoire so for the last couple of months that he had been trying to get back on track. Of course occasionally he did drop by and took her out on a date, it was inevitable. Victoire drew closer to Teddy as she tiptoed. Teddy being much taller than Victoire, she had to. Teddy lowered his head and kissed Victoire even more passionately.

"You're snogging!" came a familiar nosy voice. Teddy broke off the kiss and sighed when he saw James standing in front of them. "You both were snogging, weren't you? I can tell." He looked at Victoire. "I can't believe you are both snogging!" James's eyes sparkled as he looked at the pair. "You're snogging," he repeated.

Teddy rolled his eyes. "Go away, James," he hissed. James stood there for a moment. Teddy waved his hand at him. "Go away. Go on. I bet your friends are looking for you now." James turned and ran off. Teddy looked back at Victoire. "But he was right, you know, we were snogging," he said in an amused tone of voice.

"You started it," said Victoire softly. She closed her eyes and tiptoed again. Teddy smiled and kissed her lips gently. He felt Victoire's hand run through his hair. Victoire slowly broke it off and opened her eyes. "I'm going to write to you everyday and I'm going to kill you if you don't write back," she threatened, though she looked very happy at the moment.

**I'm still here**

Teddy brushed away the hair on Victoire's face. The train sounded. "You better go," said Teddy. Victoire nodded. Teddy watched as Victoire hopped into the train. She leaned out the window and waved at Teddy. "I'll see you on Christmas!" exclaimed Teddy as he watched the train move on. It would be three painful months again until Victoire comes back from Hogwarts.

Teddy walked back through the barrier. He no longer waited for Harry and Ginny before Apparating to the Daily Prophet's office to report of Ginny's absence. He used to work at the office before he became an Auror so practically everyone knew him. Teddy waved at his ex-officemates and headed back out to the fresh air. It was always stuffy inside that office for some reason.

Without another thought, Teddy Apparated to the graves of the family he had. He didn't have any flowers this time. He crouched down and read his parents' name again. Teddy smiled. His life had been going up and down and the only things constant were changes. He could never understand why he had to be left behind, but he didn't mind now. He was just happy that they would never feel any more pain any longer and they were in a much better place.

Teddy stood up and took a step back. He gazed at the clouds above him. He could just be imagining it, but they were smiling back at him, all of them. They knew that he was there, living a life that they could be proud of. Teddy knew that he would, from now on, stand on his own. But that didn't matter. He was living, alive, with a heart beating; capable of love, or hurt.

He had let go of all his past feelings about his parents. Hating them won't do him any good, or so he figured out. Loving them would do the world much better. Understanding them would do his heart much better. Teddy knew this. He took a deep breath and let go of all his hurts. It was time to move on now; to the life he wanted to live. With Victoire, maybe. He still wished to chase his dream about curing werewolves. He knew he would figure out a way to…somehow.

Teddy Lupin may have been thrown around, casted away, and hated. But all of those things were simple. All Teddy knew that he had to stand up and hold his head up high, for his parents, who had died for him because they had loved him more than he could ever know. He had to move on for his grandmother who took care of him all her life, and loved him, and wanted to see the man that he could become.

"I'm still here," Teddy whispered. A smile crept to his face as he looked at the graves one last time. The wind blew past him. Birds flew about his head. Everything seemed back to normal as it could be. Teddy turned and Apparated away under that sunny day with the clear blue sky.

**I'm still here**

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